#DMTBeautySpot #beauty

Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.

Today: a clinical psychologist who makes $345,000 per year and spends some of her money this week on iced coffee.

Occupation: Clinical Psychologist
Industry: Mental Health Care
Age: 43
Location: New York, NY
Salary: $345,000
Net Worth: ~$2.365 million (I own my apartment (valued at ~$1.8 M), $320,000 in a savings account, $245,000 in a SEP-IRA/retirement fund. Debt: ~$2,000. This is the balance I owe for my Peloton. I pay my credit cards in full every month, whenever possible. Regarding my annual salary noted above, $345,000 is what I grossed in 2020. I’m self-employed, so this fluctuates from year to year)
Debt: $2,000, which is the balance on my Peloton bike. I financed it through Affirm.
Paycheck Amount (I move earnings from my business to my personal bank accounts several times a month.): ~$28,500 gross per month (I’m self-employed so I don’t have a paycheck per se)
Pronouns: She/her

Monthly Expenses
Housing: $2,620 ($1,320 for common charges, $1,300 for property taxes). My mortgage was paid off several years ago.
Electricity: $100-$300
Cell Phone/Internet: $130
Health Insurance: $970
Disability Insurance: $770
Zipcar Membership: $76/year
Amazon Prime: $129/year
Thrive Market Membership: $65/year
Costco Membership: $65/year
Spotify: $9.99
Peloton Membership: $39
Peleton Payments: $74
Homeowners Insurance: $3,300/year
Housekeeper: $200 (every two weeks, $100 per visit)
Monthly Self-Employment Business Expenses: ~$4,300 (this includes office rent, electricity, internet, insurances, cleaning, supplies, technology, continuing education, etc)

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, it was expected that I’d go to college but we never had any conversations about it. My parents immigrated to the U.S. in the mid-1970s. My parents were clueless about the U.S. education system, SATs, etc, and they had little time/interest/mental space to learn about it. I did my best to figure things out on my own. My father did not complete high school. After completing his military service, he worked in various labor roles. He was smart, but not formally educated. My mother was grad educated. When they got to the U.S., she immediately had me and my sibling. She simultaneously learned English and studied for her boards in the U.S. My father died when I was a teenager. He was no longer the main breadwinner by the time I became a preteen. I’ve never taken any student loans. My mother planned for and paid my tuition for undergraduate, master’s, and doctoral programs. She also paid my rent all of those years. I am well aware of my privilege, though it came at a price.

Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
We did not really have conversations about money, or anything really. My parents were always working and stressed about money and a slew of other things. The list of things to worry about when you are immigrants is endless, made much more difficult when you try to navigate it all in your second language and a culture that is so different from your native one. I think my parents tried to keep financial stress from me and my sibling, but there really was no way that they could. My mother never sat me down to teach me anything really, I just picked things up and eventually built some sort of plan for my financial future that did not involve an inheritance or help from anyone at all.

What was your first job and why did you get it?
My first job was working for my mother’s business, which I’d do in the summers, mostly. I was about 14. I had short-term retail jobs here and there from my late teenage years through undergrad, but I wouldn’t last long in any of them. So I don’t even count these as jobs in my life narrative. My first long-term steady jobs were during graduate school, working in my intended field.

Did you worry about money growing up?
Yes and no. I worried more about the tension and instability in our home due to my parents’ troubled relationship, though finances were not that far behind. My parents were obsessive about saving every penny they could for a down payment for a house because that was part of their American dream. That meant that I had two outfits to wear every season. That was shameful because my school peers unrelentingly made fun of me for it. I experienced a great deal of shame for being poor and the child of immigrants. Even when things became much easier financially, I never felt like I belonged.

Do you worry about money now?
I do, occasionally. I’m a single woman and I earn a very good living, but you never know. I often worry that things could come crashing down at any moment. I’m certain that this is intergenerational trauma passed down through several generations. I try very hard to remember that I’ve got massive hustle in me and I will do whatever I have to do to take care of myself. No one can take away my education, intelligence, and talent. During COVID, I worked like crazy, around the clock, and it took a very big emotional toll on me. I’m very good at what I do but when you are the instrument and you feel like you’re slipping, it’s pretty scary. I check my accounts several times a week to remind myself that I’m okay and will be okay.

At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I became financially responsible for myself at 34, which is not that long ago. After graduate school and working as a psychologist in a hospital system, I decided to complete a four-year postgraduate program to become a psychoanalyst. My mother helped me during those years too. It would have been impossible to financially manage it all without her help. This is not spoken about much, at least in my experience, but becoming a psychologist and psychoanalyst takes many, many years (as it should) and it feels impossible for someone without privilege to do this. It needs to be said that the knowledge and experience I gained from that last psychoanalytic training program stepped my game up by many levels and allowed me to earn the kind of living I do today. Because I had financial help, I was able to start a small private practice. If I needed money today I know that I could ask my mother but I wouldn’t. I’d likely ask friends first.

Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
I was financially supported throughout my education and early career. Though it was not income, I did not earn that money. My sibling and I stand to inherit a fair amount of assets between us, but I do not think about this much. I plan to give whatever my entire share will be to my sibling. That’s important to me.

Day One

7 a.m. — I get up and walk my dogs. We stop at Starbucks to pick up my almost daily four shots of espresso over ice ($3.54, and $1 tip). I adore this particular Starbucks location. I’ve known the people who work there for years and they make my day. We walk until everyone’s done their personal business and I’ve finished my coffee. We get home around 7:45 and I make breakfast — a bowl of Greek yogurt with some peanut butter granola and a banana. I had that in the fridge. I do some basic grooming and get dressed and am in front of my computer to start work at 8:14. I go nonstop until 12:15. $4.54

12:20 p.m. — I order in tacos to be delivered around 1. I’ll have those for lunch and dinner ($37.34, includes tip, delivery fees, and whatever else UberEats charges for). I walk my dogs again and time it so that I pick the delivery up in my building lobby as the dogs and I are returning from our walk. I have two tacos for lunch and then scroll Twitter for a bit. $37.34

1:40 p.m. — I suddenly remembered to go on Amazon to order a pet vacuum that removes stains and deep cleans rugs and fabrics, as well as extra bottles of the cleaning solution ($156.74). I’ve been meaning to buy this for a while and today was that day. I’m going to steam clean my mattress and a small runner in my bedroom. I go back to work until 6:30. $156.74

7:30 p.m. — For dinner, I eat another taco and some leftover roasted veggies I have in my fridge. For dessert, I have Hu Kitchen chocolate gems that I buy at Costco whenever I take a trip there. I feed and walk my dogs and am in bed by 9. Scroll Twitter until I fell asleep.

Daily Total: $198.62

Day Two

7 a.m. — Get dressed and walk my dogs. Do the usual Starbucks run to get my usual espresso drink ($3.54, and $1 tip) except I don’t get it on ice this morning because it’s freezing out. I make breakfast at home — a cheddar and veggie omelet on two small coconut flour tortillas. I eat that and do some basic grooming before work. I work from 9 to 1. Friday is my lightest day. $4.54

1:30 p.m. — After walking my dogs again, I’m hungry. I eat the two leftover tacos from yesterday for lunch. Then, I take a long shower, scrub myself from head to toe with a Japanese scrub towel, wash my hair twice, and feel so good. I do my full skin regimen. On my face, I splash some SK-II Pitera Essence toner followed by a generous layer of LaMer concentrate on my face and neck. Once that absorbs, I usually follow that with a layer of SK-II RNA Power face cream, but don’t do that today. On my body, I use LeLabo’s body lotion in The Noir. I also use that perfume but not today since the lotion is more than enough. I towel dry my hair, comb it, and scrunch a few dabs of Oribe Supershine cream into it. I neither wear makeup nor blow dry my hair, so that’s that.

5:15 p.m. — I head to a friend’s house for dinner and bring a bottle of wine that came from my personal stash. I rarely drink wine because I don’t really like it and it makes me feel hungover the next day in a way that I can’t stand. I prefer simple drinks like vodka and gin with soda. But I always have several bottles of wine at home to offer guests or to bring with me if I’m the guest. I take the subway to my friend’s house ($2.75) and get there around 5:45. We’re all vaccinated now. We eat indoors together and hug for the first time in a long time. We also pop some edibles so within an hour I have my vibe right. That and a double vodka soda is perfect. So much fun. I take the train back around 10:30 ($2.75). Walk my dogs and go to bed. $5.50

Daily Total: $10.04

Day Three

8 a.m. — Wake up, get dressed, and walk my dogs. We go to Starbucks for my usual espresso. Take a long walk around the nearby park and make some human friends who want to pet my dogs. They love the attention and are happy to make others happy. $4.54

9:45 a.m. — I get back in bed to start an Israeli show I’ve been meaning to watch called Valley of Tears. It’s on HBO Max. I then realize that I canceled my subscription many months ago because I wasn’t using it. So I resubscribe — $14.99 a month. I watch two episodes and it’s exceptional. I’ll probably cancel it before I get charged for another month because there’s nothing else I want to watch. I mostly watch Netflix and Amazon Prime. Netflix I don’t pay for because some years ago a friend gave me her username and password as one of the devices on her account. I’ll pay for dinner and/or Starbucks every now and then, so it all comes out in the wash. $14.99

2:15 p.m. — My sister-in-law calls and says she’s going to the park with her kids and invites me to join. I bring the more active of my dogs with me. We walk/hike for about two hours and it’s a lot of fun. I buy a bottle of water from a cart inside the park. $3

5:30 p.m. — The four of us go to Eataly for dinner afterward — we split the bill (my portion is $44.10 and a $10 tip). We share two small pizzas, one pasta dish, and I have a warm spiced cocktail they make there that is out of this world. I get an espresso to go and two hazelnut chocolate bars at Eataly’s espresso bar afterward ($9.60, and $1 tip). $64.70

8:30 p.m. — Good friends I travel with call me tonight to say they found an incredible deal to the Maldives. After some deliberation and research, we decided to do it. I put the hotel booking on my credit card — $10,798. This is so extra. The booking is for five nights in two over-the-water bungalows, each with its own private pool. Everything is included, except for airfare. Half of this amount is my portion so I’ll pay that off by the credit card due date. The other half I’ll pay down as quickly as I can and my friends will pay me back by the end of this year plus whatever interest accrued on the amount. We’ve done this before and it works fine. I also get the rewards points for these charges, plus the 5X points bonus because Amex Platinum offers that for travel charges. We are on the phone until almost 10:30 talking about the trip, catching up, and planning the rest of the trip, which will include a few days in Singapore. Excited for this trip! $10,798

Daily Total: $10,885.23

Day Four

11:30 a.m. — Very lazy this morning and eventually get out of the house. Even my dogs slept in for several extra hours. I must have been really tired. Take the dogs for a slow and leisurely walk for about an hour. We stop at our fave Starbucks for my usual espresso on ice before heading to a nearby park. I use Starbucks points to pay for my drink but leave a $1 tip. We walk the paths inside the park several times. We get home at 1 and I make breakfast. I warm up the remaining leftovers from a sliced steak and onions dish I forgot that I randomly made two days ago. I put that in a skillet and mix in three eggs. So good. $1

5:30 p.m. — Watch several more episodes of Valley of Tears. It’s incredible. I make myself dinner at home: chopped beets topped with herbed goat cheese and pan-toasted hazelnuts, then drizzled with some balsamic glaze and olive oil. So simple, so delicious, and filling. I have some leftover roasted shishito peppers too. I keep my fridge temperature pretty low so that leftovers last a few days. I feed and walk my dogs around 7:30 and watch another two episodes of the show before going to bed around 11:30.

Daily Total: $1

Day Five

6:45 a.m. — Get up and walk dogs as usual. We go to Starbucks for my usual espresso over ice. We walk for about 30 minutes before returning home. I do a quick basic grooming and am ready to work at 8. I work nonstop until 1. $4.54

1:30 p.m. — Walk dogs then eat lunch at home. Last night I defrosted a chicken and veggie dish I had in the freezer so that I could have it for lunch today. I warm it up in the skillet. I work again from 3 to 6:30.

7 p.m. — Dinner is at home too. Warm up another defrosted chicken and veggie dish. Feed and walk the dogs and get to bed around 9. I’m physically and emotionally exhausted.

Daily Total: $4.54

Day Six

645 a.m. — Walk dogs and get my usual Starbucks espresso. Very quick walk. Return home and do basic grooming and eat breakfast. I make a quick frittata with leftover herbed goat cheese and some chopped shallots I had in a container in the fridge. I start work today at 8:30 and go nonstop until 1. $4.54

1:30 p.m. — Walk the dogs again then have lunch at home. I defrost another dish I have in the freezer and warm it up on the skillet. Minced meat and veggies. I work again from 3 to 7 nonstop.

7:45 p.m. — Feed and walk dogs. Then come home and warm up the leftovers from lunch. I’m spent and get in bed by 9:30.

Daily Total: $4.54

Day Seven

6:30 a.m. — Wake up and walk the dogs. Usual Starbucks run for my espresso on ice. I needed this one this morning so badly! I start work at 8 so I’ve gotta hurry so that I can quickly shower and have breakfast. I make two soft-boiled eggs and have a slice of cheddar cheese. I work from 8 to 2 with one half-hour break in there. $4.54

2:30 p.m. — Walk dogs. Come home and make lunch. Defrost another meal from the freezer and warm it up in the skillet. I’m having a turkey burger, veggies, and some pasta. I do a Peloton class before eating. I eat afterward then quickly wash up and change. Got work again from 4:30 to 7.

7:45 p.m. — Not that hungry after a late lunch so I snack on some almonds and chocolate chips. I find some dried plums on my counter too. Good enough. Also make a hot chocolate with unsweetened chocolate, cream, and hot water. Yum. So tired. I go to bed at 10.

Daily Total: $4.54

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DMTBeautySpot

via https://www.DMTBeautySpot.com

Refinery29, Khareem Sudlow

#DMTBeautySpot #beauty

Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.

Today: a freelance writer who makes $58,000 per year and spends some of her money this week on bacon donuts.

Occupation: Freelance Writer
Industry: Publishing
Age: 36
Location: Huntington, WV
Salary: $58,000 (based on a three-year average)
Net Worth: $46,000 (savings and tangible assets)
Debt: $0
Paycheck Amount (1x/week): $750-$2,500
Pronouns: She/her

Monthly Expenses
Rent: $600
Utilities: $400-$500
Internet/Land Line: $75
Cell Phone: $35
Medical Costs: $450 (includes health insurance)
Homeschool Subscription: $45
Subscriptions: $31 (Microsoft Office, Disney+, Instacart, Amazon Prime)
Car Insurance: $50
Kids’ Allowance: $56
Yard Maintenance: $120 (April through December)

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Not really. My mom did a little college, but most of my family didn’t attend. We had a lot of construction workers, mechanics, and service industry workers in my family. No education required, just a strong back. I got my B.Acc. through an online school when my son was a toddler. I paid with grants, scholarships, and taking advantage of flat-rate pricing. I was able to shave over a year and a half off by running a double class load most of the time. I paid a flat fee for full-time and was able to take up to double the credit hours. I lived frugally to not take on any debt. I used savings accumulated up to the age of 24 when I started as well. My son and I lived on about $10,000 a year for the first two years before I started freelance writing on the side for extra money.

Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
We didn’t talk about money when we were kids. It was something that we didn’t have and that was that.

What was your first job and why did you get it?
I started picking raspberries for a local farm when I was about 9 or 10. I continued to work there for several years in the summer. It was right down the road from my cousins and the lake, so it was perfect for an early morning few hours of work and then swimming the rest of the day. Added in a paper route at 11 and then started working in restaurants by 14 or 15.

Did you worry about money growing up?
I didn’t worry about it. We just didn’t have it. I learned young to make my own money and I always had some in my pocket from that point on. I was always hustling in one way or another.

Do you worry about money now?
Not all that much. I woke up at 24 with a brain disease and never got better. It put things into perspective. I work as much as I need to instead of as much as I can. Life is short and health and time are far more important. COVID has emphasized that even more.

At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I was on my own financially at age 16. I dropped out of school, moved out, and went full-time at my waitressing job. Savings and assets are my safety net, though notably flimsy.

Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
I have several hundred articles, college papers, and recipes on a content site that has been making me ad revenue for almost a decade now. There was a lot of upfront work, but some consider it passive. Either way, it is a small income monthly, depending on views. I also have romance novels on Amazon KDP that collect money with each sale.

Day One

6:15 a.m. — Wake up, shower and coffee. Please assume from now on that every entry has me with coffee in my hand. All-day. Medically, I need large amounts of caffeine, and coffee is the best option. I also have some saltines to settle my stomach. (I had a spontaneous cranial leak, so this helps speed up my cerebrospinal fluid. Basically, it keeps me able to stay vertical.) The house is quiet for a little while so I jump into work. I answer emails, proofread, and write until kids start waking up.

8 a.m. — Breakfast of yogurt, cantaloupe, and blood oranges, as well as the normal morning routine for the kids — brush teeth, wash face, get dressed, make beds, etc.

9 a.m. — Toddler daughter does her speech therapy videos (YouTube) and tween son does his online math program. I bounce back and forth between “Old McDonald” and dividing fractions. I clean and help when needed. My son has a full curriculum online, as well as extra math, reading and writing, and larger projects in his interests, so he spends the day doing that. My daughter works through preschool books with a lot of reading, playing, and free time.

12:30 p.m. — Lunch of tuna salad sandwiches for the kids and a salad mix for me. The kids run around for a while before quiet time. My daughter naps and my son finishes up schoolwork. I take a quick work break to online shop. I get three toothbrushes and one of my son’s birthday gifts on Amazon, a Star Trek board game. $58.45

3:30 p.m. — My mom comes over and brings me some of my prescriptions and liquid IV from the pharmacy. We visit for a while and she stays for dinner. (She is one of a few in our high-risk pandemic bubble. Glad she can visit, and she does often, living a few blocks away.) $42.08

5 p.m. — We are all craving Chinese food, but the last decent place in a 20-mile radius closed up. I find a recipe for sticky chicken and serve it with broccoli, cucumber kimchi, and jasmine rice. Then it’s time for playing, chores, and cleaning, before baths and bed for my daughter around 8.

9 30 p.m. — Bubble bath and an episode or two of Expanse. I work out tomorrow’s schedule and then order a few books on secondsale.com. My son asked for a sci-fi fiction book for free reading and I throw a couple of books in for myself. Stay up for a while working on my budget. Asleep by 2 a.m. $20.13

Daily Total: $120.66

Day Two

9:30 a.m. — Late start all around. Breakfast for kids is Nutella toast, fruit, and ham slices. I have my obligatory coffee and saltines, as well as a liquid IV packet in water.

10:30 a.m. — Speech therapy video for daughter and my son does his math program. Both go on for about 20 or 30 minutes and then we do more school. My son has his own list to do and likes to dictate when it happens. The rule is he has to finish before turning on the TV, so that keeps him motivated. My daughter is of the age of play and storytimes. We have a tea party and my son starts to make lunch. He is making pizza pasta and is pretty excited. His cooking skills have really taken off in the pandemic.

12:30 p.m. — We eat lunch, it’s pretty good. It is about 55 degrees, the warmest it has been in weeks, so I get the kids semi-bundled up and we go outside to play for a while. We also take a walk. While they play, I clean out the shed and do some garden work. My daughter goes down for a nap by 2 and my son goes back to school. I start working. I type out the first few chapters of the fourth installment of a series.

4:30 p.m. — I start dinner. We have stuffed bell peppers, roasted potatoes, and salad. I also find an old key lime pie mix in the cupboard, two years past its best by date. I had half and half and whip it up like a mousse and it turns out great. Chores and kitchen clean up. We go through the house and pick up before I give my daughter her bath. She is exhausted from running around in the fresh air but still fighting the good fight. She plays with her brother until around 8 and then goes to bed. I do some more work.

10 p.m. — Bubble bath and journaling. I watch some Outlander and wonder why the conflict is always the same. I have a few pistachios and some dark chocolate. Night routine and then I try to go to bed. Sleep isn’t happening. I hate tossing and turning. I would rather be productive, so I go back to writing for a bit. I finish another chapter before I go to bed around 1:30.

Daily Total: $0

Day Three

6:45 a.m. — Wake up and shower. My daughter is already up, so we do the morning routine and start breakfast. She helps me make chocolate crescent rolls, scrambled eggs, and some cut-up fruit. My son gets up soon after, most likely because of the smell of pastries.

9 a.m. — My mom comes over and I set my daughter up with her speech video and my son starts math. I hate going to stores in person, so I go early when they first open and get out as quickly as possible. My mom watches the kids while I run to Dollar General for paper towels, tissues, and vitamins ($6.20 with coupons). Piggly Wiggly for 34 pounds of split-cut chicken breasts ($29.55) and the farmer’s market for strawberries, lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, and bananas ($18.96). $54.71

10 a.m. — Start butchering chicken for individual meals for the freezer. I boil up about 10 pounds of it for broth and shredded chicken and put it in the freezer. My mom gets about 10 pounds to take home. The kids play until lunchtime. The whole house smells like chicken at this point. We all eat lunch together. I spend the afternoon working and watching the kids.

7 p.m. — We eat dinner and then chores and kitchen clean-up. Kids are in bed by 8:30 and I start working. Write a few chapters, before I call it a night.

11 p.m. — Bubble bath and Stieg Larsson novel. I then put together a Walmart pick-up order through Ibotta. I get pull-ups, wipes, cheddar, creamer, coffee, chocolate, sippy cups, allergy meds, orange juice, Miracle-Gro garden soil, and mulch. Really hoping this will be the last box of pull-ups I have to buy. Fingers crossed. $73.58

Daily Total: $128.29

Day Four

9 a.m. — Wake up and morning routine with kids. So tired. Son has already been up a bit and made himself cereal. I do the same for my daughter, paired with a banana. I have few shots of pickle juice, water, coffee, and saltines. (Because of my CSF leak, I have to take in a lot of salts and other electrolytes and water to compensate.) Mom comes over and brings me the pickup order from late last night. I get it out of the car and it’s only 26 degrees. It’s so cold! I need spring to hurry up. The winter has been so long and cold this year. Ibotta rebates $24.93 back from Walmart and I send it through to my bank account.

10 a.m. — I visit with my mom. Kids are directed to their speech and math activities. Son keeps going on reading his book, Space Barons. His new book will be here in a couple of days and he wants to start on it as soon as it comes. He stops to tell us about some cool things they are doing to get ready for living on Mars. He is really excited by the book and I’m so happy.

12 p.m. — I make a lunch of grilled chicken with Annie’s macaroni and cheese, plus raw veggies. My mom goes home and I put my daughter down for a nap. I start working and my son finishes up his schoolwork for the day.

4:45 p.m. — Start dinner of grilled chicken (leftover from lunch) and mushroom risotto, with glazed carrots and peas. I pay the kids their allowance. They get a dollar for every year they’ve been alive, per week. My son is a saver and has more cash on hand than I do most of the time. Staying at home so much has really kicked his saving into high gear. My daughter’s money goes in her jar as well. Chores and then baths for the kids. I skip cleaning and get to work earlier.

9 p.m. — I do some journaling and lose track of time reading articles. Too much news, so I make a screwdriver and pair it with dark chocolate. Definitely avoiding the dirty kitchen, knowing I will regret it in the morning. Expanse and a very hot bath seem to be what I need right now.

Daily Total: $0

Day Five

6:30 a.m. — Wake up and stand under the shower for 20 minutes. This is probably why my water bill is over $100. Make coffee and watch the sunrise, enjoying the quiet house. I read a little before my mom comes over for coffee. She is in sell mode and has been listing on Facebook Marketplace all morning. I run out to check my PO box and grab a few bacon donuts on the way home. I pair it with turkey sausage and strawberries. $5.11

9 a.m. — I put together an Instacart order from Aldi. I get spinach, tomatoes, bell peppers, cabbage, jalapenos, ginger, garlic, spices, grapes, pineapple, pears, yogurt, goat cheese, French bread, and brioche buns. $61.78

12:30 p.m. — I take my mom to AutoZone to get her car fixed. I try to tip the guy for being so helpful in the cold, but he won’t let me. Grab Wendy’s for lunch, spicy chicken asiago for me, salad for mom, and kid’s meals with chicken nuggets and Frosties for the kids. Feeling sluggish and remember why I don’t usually get fast food. $34.48

2 p.m. — I work for a while and send an email to AutoZone to say thank you. If they won’t let me tip then they can hear about how great he is. Dinner is chicken taco salad and sweet corn, followed by playtime, chores, clean-up, and baths.

8 p.m. — I get the kids to bed and start work. I finish a rough draft of this book, so I’m done for the day. Bath and coupon matching with a couple of YouTube videos for tomorrow. Bed by 12.

Daily Total: $101.37

Day Six

6 a.m. — Wake up and shower. Coffee. Text mom and clip coupons while I watch a YouTube video on unadvertised deals for the week. My kids are up and morning routine commences. Breakfast is ham, egg, and cheese on toast, Danimal smoothies, and oranges. Mom comes by and has one too. She needs a few things, so gives me a list.

9 a.m. — I head out on a CVS coupon shopping trip. Five packs of beef jerky, two Garnier micellar wipes, four Whole Blends shampoo and conditioners, five tubes of toothpaste, two toothbrushes, two Venus razors, Annie’s fruit snacks, deodorant, vitamins, and liquid IV ($11.18 — Saved $142). I also end up with $16 in CVS Carebucks to use at a later date. Then I go to Piggly Wiggly. My son requested dark chocolate Silk, so I run in and see a 15-pound box of bacon for $35. I get that and the milk for $38.97. I drop off a few boxes of my couponing products to a local charity (mainly toothpaste, razors, shampoo, and feminine care items). $50.15

10 a.m. — Back home and my son goes to my mom’s place for a visit. I send receipts through to Fetch, another rewards app, and they send a few dollars in points to my account. My daughter helps me put away the coupon haul and then we have girl time. We do clay masks, paint our nails, and do our hair. Lunch is Spaghetti-Os, cantaloupe, and cottage cheese. I make chicken quesadillas with leftover meat from dinner and freeze them easy meals later. My daughter is in bed by 2:30 and I start proofing the book I just finished.

5:30 p.m. — My mom brings my son home and we have dinner. Pulled bbq chicken sandwiches with broccoli and roasted potatoes. Strawberries and cream for dessert. Bath and chores, followed by playtime and bed. My daughter missed her brother and they always act like they haven’t seen each other in years. It gets really loud. I play Magic: The Gathering. Bath and bed not too long afterward for me.

Daily Total: $50.15

Day Seven

7:30 a.m. — Shower and wake up. All the liquids. Kids are still sleeping thankfully. Scroll news stories and get in a bad mood. Check the vaccination website where I am registered. It’s going to be a while yet. My mom will be vaccinated soon, her age group is coming up next. I want one now but will have to wait a little while longer. Feels like forever. Text my mom and tell her good morning. Cereal and bananas for breakfast before school commences for the day. Everyone seems grouchy, myself included. A lot of bickering and arguing going on.

10:30 a.m. — Give up on schoolwork and pull out a big art tub. Coloring and painting liven the crew. Lunch is grilled teriyaki catfish, rice noodles, carrot sticks, and yogurt. Free time madness and nap by 1:30. I start working and my son goes back to school.

3:30 p.m. — Walk with kids and then outside play for a couple of hours. Dinner is chicken stroganoff with green beans and salad. Hero 6 movie with dinner.

9 p.m. — Chores, cleaning, and baths done. Kids in bed. I start working on some more proofreading. I’m tired after a couple of hours and stop for the night. Bath with lavender Epsom salt and some Stieg Larsson before bed about an hour later.

Daily Total: $0

Money Diaries are meant to reflect an individual’s experience and do not necessarily reflect Refinery29’s point of view. Refinery29 in no way encourages illegal activity or harmful behavior.

The first step to getting your financial life in order is tracking what you spend — to try on your own, check out our guide to managing your money every day. For more money diaries, click here.

Do you have a Money Diary you’d like to share? Submit it with us here.

Have questions about how to submit or our publishing process? Read our Money Diaries FAQ doc here or email us here.

Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?

A Week In Brooklyn, NY, On A $116,000 Salary

A Week In Philadelphia, PA, On A $54,000 Salary

Are You Reading Lots Of Smut Right Now? Same

DMTBeautySpot

via https://www.DMTBeautySpot.com

Refinery29, Khareem Sudlow

#DMTBeautySpot #beauty

Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.

Today: a pastry chef who makes $25 an hour and spends some of her money this week on a stuffed Muttley.

Occupation: Pastry chef
Industry: Hospitality
Age: 42
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Salary: $25/hour
Net Worth: $141,000 (This includes approximately $100,000 in an IRA, $16,000 in a mutual fund, $25,000 in savings. My boyfriend and I have been together for five years but do not have shared accounts; he pays me each month for his half of rent, groceries, and utilities.)
Debt: $0
Paycheck Amount (2x/month): $1,300-$1,600
Pronouns: She/her

Monthly Expenses
Rent: $662 for my half of a one-bedroom apartment that I share with my boyfriend
Car Lease: $325
Netflix: $0 (boyfriend’s mom’s account)
Apple Music: $9.99
Cable/Internet: $0 (paid by my boyfriend)
Utilities: $45 for my half
Vanguard IRA: $200
Car Insurance: $195
Renters Insurance: $15
Health Insurance: $550
Cell Phone: on a family plan with my mom who is graciously paying my half while I’m underemployed
NY Times: $4
LA Times: $16
NPR: $10

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, there was and though I excelled in high school, I really didn’t want to go to college. I was a photographer and ended up going to a very good art school but dropped out after two years. I eventually went to culinary school and my parents paid for both. I do NOT recommend culinary school for so many reasons!

Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My mom was a saver and my dad was not. He was several years behind on his taxes until my mom pulled him out of it. Mostly, I learned about saving and not accruing credit card debt from my mom. Most of my mother’s wealth now is from property my dad bought in the 1960s and 1970s, but I don’t believe I will ever be able to own property in Los Angeles.

What was your first job and why did you get it?
My first job was at a local coffee shop as a cashier and barista. I got it in high school for spending money and continued it into college.

Did you worry about money growing up?
I didn’t really worry about money per se, but I knew that I couldn’t have the Guess jeans that all my friends had in sixth grade. We did not take fancy vacations or anything like that. My parents made much more money when I got a little older and my mom would definitely indulge us. I didn’t get an allowance; as a teenager, my mom just basically gave me what I asked for (obviously within reason).

Do you worry about money now?
Yes, all the time. At the start of the pandemic, my $60,000 salary was taken away and we were all given $15/hour. I was on partial unemployment until the first reopening last June. When we reopened, I was offered $20/hour, which I negotiated to $25/hour at the height of a very busy summer. I used to work 10-12 hours a day as a salaried employee, but now I only work six to eight hours a day and bring in roughly $45,000 a year. It’s been a big hit for me because I have some big bills, such as my very expensive health insurance (which most restaurant people I know don’t have). Thankfully, my rent is not bad.

At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
Up until age 25, I was living rent-free at home. I moved out with my then-boyfriend and that’s when I became fiscally independent. I do have a decent amount in savings and retirement I could tap if needed, and my boyfriend definitely came through last year chipping in more for the monthly expenses (his job was unaffected by the pandemic and he makes more money than I do). I could also rely on my mom for help if needed.

Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
Several years ago my mom gifted me $10,000 after the sale of a building and I put it in a mutual fund. I have occasionally taken out some money to travel, then not touched it to let it grow again.

Day One

8 a.m. — I arrive at work, put some ice cream base on the stove to start cooking, then sit down with a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios and a double espresso. The perks of being the boss, I can have breakfast as soon as I get to work. Today is Sunday and we have brunch service, so it will be a busy day. Our general manager gets in after my breakfast and since she is one of my best friends, we spend 15 minutes reviewing the gossip of the last few days. Restaurants are full of gossip, all the time, and she knows all of it (as a good GM should). I take a low dose of Xanax (prescribed to me) because busy Sundays make my heart race.

4 p.m. — At the end of my Sunday brunch shift, I always sit down with our GM for an amaro and more gossip; we call it amaro clock. The gossip today is about trying to replace our chef de cuisine AND sous chef at the same time, no good at all.

5:30 p.m. — Since I’ve already spent a long day cooking other people’s food, I hate to come home and cook on Sunday nights. I stop at a Jersey Mike’s and get sandwiches ($20.20 with tip). I get home and my boyfriend, S., and I unwind with bourbons (with a splash of my favorite amaro in mine, restaurant people love bitter aperitifs) and music and talk about our days. We watch Schitt’s Creek with dinner (after he rejects the headlines on 60 Minutes, we are old) and I am sad we are almost done with the series. $20.20

8:30 p.m. — Get into bed because I have to open the restaurant tomorrow and have to wake up at 4:15 a.m. I am currently rewatching Dexter and it takes me about two episodes to actually fall asleep. S. stays up grading papers and playing video games in the living room. He teaches from home and literally never leaves the house, I have no idea how he can stand it.

Daily Total: $20.20

Day Two

4:15 a.m. — 4:15 is deeply horrible. No matter how much I do it, there is nothing natural about getting up in the middle of the night. I get up, read the nightly email from the restaurant, and scroll Instagram for a few minutes before turning on the shower. My cat and I have a ritual where I lay back down in bed for the five minutes it takes the shower to heat up and she sits on my chest for pets until she gets tired of it and tries to bite me. At 5 a.m., I’m off!

7:30 a.m. — Once the pastry case in the cafe is fully stocked, I can finally relax with some Cheerios and espresso. We are out of strawberries for my cereal but I remember there is leftover farmer’s market strawberry compote from a dessert special and spoon the whole runny, jammy mess into my bowl. I applaud myself for my cheffyness. Also there is now bonus strawberry milk left at the bottom of the bowl.

12 p.m. — Lunch! You would think working in a restaurant would give you a lot of lunch options, but you just end up tired of all the food, even the food hacks where you frankenstein the various components into new dishes. Our GM and I keep a variety of frozen foods on hand that are quick to make, so today I settle on a few chicken tenders (easy access to a fryer is magical), some bagel chips, and my house-made ranch for dipping. Always ranch. After lunch, I make an ice cream base and some little frozen mousses for dinner service. Even though I hate hate hate opening, it’s better than closing and gets me home early in the day.

2:30 p.m. — I get home just as S. is finishing a Zoom class. We chat about our days and he laughs this kind of wheezy laugh and stops and asks me if I remember an old cartoon dog with a laugh like that. YES, I DO AND HIS NAME IS MUTTLEY. He is an old Hanna-Barbera cartoon and the sidekick to Dick Dastardly. S. makes me spend the next half hour watching Muttley on YouTube and trying to perfect his Muttley laugh. He hurts himself a little. I spend the rest of the afternoon reading both newspapers I subscribe to, Eater LA and Buzzfeed, then taking a well-deserved nap with the cat.

5:30 p.m. — Time to start thinking about dinner. I pour us some bourbon and pull up the Smitten Kitchen recipe for baked pasta with sausage and broccoli raab, it’s S.’s favorite. After the pasta, S. eats a cookie I brought home from work and I eat…a piece of parmesan. Here is the worst thing about me: I’m a pastry chef and I don’t really like sweets. But give me a piece of good cheese and a few olives after dinner and I am in hog heaven. A walk around the neighborhood, then more Schitt’s Creek, then bed and Dexter at 8:30.

Daily Total: $0

Day Three

4:15 a.m. — Just. The. Absolute. Worst. I have to open the restaurant three days a week now and it honestly never gets easier.

10:30 a.m. — After a morning spent making muffin batter, ice cream, and sponge cake, I lean under the station to get something and somehow knock over a sanitizer bucket right into my shoe. My pants and socks are soaking wet and I briefly consider just giving up and going home.

11:30 a.m. — Our chef and owner comes in to do some R&D and it’s nice to see them. They set up to work on the table next to me so I get to have little tastes. Our chef is very famous and isn’t here very often. (Celebrity chefs DO NOT cook in their restaurants.) I’m glad I didn’t leave even though I am still squishing in my shoes. I bake off a few of my new cookies and they love it, and I am very happy.

2:30 p.m. — I get home and S. is still talking about Muttley. I decide I am going to buy him a stuffed Muttley, figuring I can find a vintage one, but I go online and discover that because he was in a strange movie called Scoob! last year, Amazon sells stuffed Muttleys! I snap one up and keep it a secret from S. $13.83

5:30 p.m. — Bourbon and amaro and dinner time. I’ve been super into french onion soup lately (Smitten Kitchen recipe again), and when I make it there’s always leftovers that I freeze so I barely have to do any prep tonight. I pair it with a quick salad. I top the toast on the soup with about twice as much gruyere as is advisable, and the cheese pull is phenomenal. S. eats the ice cream I brought home from work and I have a stick of Juicy Fruit gum, another favorite dessert. We eat, watch Jeopardy, go for a quick walk, watch some Schitt’s Creek, then I am in bed early so I can wake from the dead one more time tomorrow.

Daily Total: $13.83

Day Four

4:15 a.m. — Ugh.

8:30 a.m. — One of our cooks urgently calls me into the other room, so I hurry over. I find three people standing around a tub of something that looks like jam, jiggles like jam, smells like jam, and is labeled “jam.” They want to know if it is jam. I consider going home.

1 p.m. — Lunch with our GM. The days we work together are ALL about lunch. Today, it is a frozen Amy’s cheese pizza, which I top with good olive oil, sliced pepperoncini, and pineapple (come at me). We obviously dip our crusts in ranch. We toast to our own lunch brilliance and gossip some more on the patio.

2:30 p.m. — Get home and flop on the couch to work on my cookbook. A friend is setting up a meeting for me with a culinary book packager. I spend some time working on the main introduction and on recipe introductions. I compile my own photos and daydream about a book full of big glossy photographs.

5:30 p.m. — S. has a Zoom meeting with his family while I get started on dinner. Before you accuse him of not pulling his weight, he is NOT allowed to cook. When I met him, he was eating quesadillas filled with granola. I make yet another Smitten Kitchen recipe (I owe her everything) of tomato sausage risotto (if you’re looking up the recipe, I add a small box of basil to it and it makes a world of difference). I have to balance what I make during the week because S. needs leftovers for lunch since he works from home, but I don’t want to end up with too many leftovers because I will NOT eat them (leftovers are gross except for pizza and Thanksgiving). This will make a few days of leftovers and S. eats them happily. Jeopardy, evening walk, and bed a little later than usual because I get to sleep in tomorrow!!

Daily Total: $0

Day Five

6:45 a.m. — SLEEPING UNTIL 6:45 IS BLISSFUL.

8 a.m. — Get to work, and it’s ice cream spinning day! I get myself all set up to run the machine, then have breakfast of scrambled egg, hash browns, and espresso. I get started spinning, and while the ice cream spins, I do the dishes. One of the worst consequences of the pandemic is that we no longer have a daytime dishwasher and it is TERRIBLE. With four to six people working in the kitchen, you have to stay on top of the dishes or you are sunk. We all hate it.

12 p.m.— Lunch with the GM is the good snappy hot dogs from the butcher shop that I throw in the fryer to cook.

1 p.m. — One of my favorite specialty vendors who is also a good friend comes in under the pretense of trying some new vanillas. We gossip for two hours on the patio and taste vanilla for about ten minutes (did I tell you restaurants are built on gossip?). She works for an independent purveyor who is obviously struggling right now and I try to source as many things as possible from her.

4:30 p.m. — I get home, grateful it is my Friday, and MUTTLEY HAS ARRIVED. I tell S. to close his eyes and put out his hands and I hand him Muttley. He is over the moon and shows off his Muttley laugh. Then the three of us watch some cartoons.

7 p.m. — Tonight is pizza night and we order a salad and a large pizza ($43.81, S. pays). I get veggies on my half and S. complains that it’s too slimy when he eats it leftover. But he eats it anyway. I bring home S. a piece of carrot cake and I have…another slice of pizza for dessert? I would like to tell you that when I don’t have to get up the next day, I go to bed late, but once you’re used to going to bed early, you can’t stop. I take a sleeping pill so I don’t accidentally wake up early, and it is bliss.

Daily Total: $0

Day Six

9 a.m. — SLEEP IN! I wake up, make coffee, read emails and scroll Instagram, then start working on my grocery shopping list. It’s a task I love. I meal plan for the whole week and only go shopping once a week.

10:30 a.m. — Off to the grocery store. I get the basics here, then shop elsewhere for specialty items. Among other things, I get Four Roses bourbon, canned salmon as a treat for the cat, Svedka vodka and tomato juice for bloody marys, hickory chips for the grill (hooked on hickory), cheddar for burgers, and the prep for chilaquiles, pad see ew, cassoulet, and baked potato soup ($110.36, split with S.). $55.18

11:30 a.m. — Head over to the Original Farmer’s Market at Third and Fairfax. I love using the vendors there and shopping local for the fancy stuff and quality meat. From the butcher I get sausages for the cassoulet, flank steak for the pad see ew, and burgers to grill tonight ($24.50, split with S.). I get a baguette ($4.50, split), and go wild in the cheese shop for our weekly Friday lunch. I get a soft cheese (Brillat Savarin), a hard cheese (Beaufort), a blue (Fourme d’Ambert), proscuitto, and Castelvetrano olives ($38.70, split). $33.85

12 p.m. — After shopping, I hit the seafood restaurant there for my favorite weekly treat: oysters! I get six oysters on the half shell and slowly, quietly slurp them down. It is heavenly. I would get a dozen but $50 on something that is barely a snack is hard to justify. $24.90

12:30 p.m. — Get home, put away groceries, start a load of laundry ($2.25) and then finally settle in for a bloody mary with ALLLL the garnishes and some reading. I am reading Dr. Carl Hart’s Drug Use for Grown-Ups and it is a clear-headed and very different approach; the drug policies in this country are offensive. Lunch is a groaning board of the baguette, meat and cheeses, and tomatoes and peppers. After this weekly lunch, we have a family agreement to pass out in our respective spots (me, couch, S., bed). I put on The Conjuring 2 and quickly fall asleep. I take horror movie naps, and yes, the screaming wakes me up. $2.25

7 p.m. — It is grilling time! S. sets up our little Weber grill behind the apartment and I make homemade onion rings. We top our burgers with barbecue sauce and an onion ring and it is *chef’s kiss*. I always have to remember to buy beer for S. because he apparently cannot run the grill without a beer? Schitt’s Creek, Dexter, sleeping pill, bed.

Daily Total: $116.18

Day Seven

9 a.m. — Blissful as always to sleep in. I have coffee, look at emails and Instagram, and text a friend about coming over later for bloody marys. I got COVID at work at the end of January (I started having symptoms the morning after a negative test, so word to the wise about using negative tests as a free pass to see people maskless) so I figure I have the immunity to sit on the front lawn having drinks from six feet away with a friend (S. will stay inside; he somehow managed to not catch COVID from me). I get a second cup of coffee and manage to book an appointment for the vaccine! Our area just opened up for food service workers to get it and I am very excited. Even if it has a microchip in it.

12 p.m. — Every Saturday we get sandwiches from my friend’s cafe. This week I get the best cheesesteak in the city and S. gets a chicken laffa wrap. We watch an old episode of The Simpsons while we eat. I pine for a nap but my friend is on his way. $35

1:30 p.m. — Bloody marys on the front lawn with my best friend! It’s nice to feel slightly normal.

5:30 p.m. — Pour a bourbon and start the prep for chilaquiles. I make the sauce and the tortilla chips from scratch. We top them with eggs, crema, Oaxaca cheese, and guacamole and are suitably stuffed after. We take a long walk, then Schitt’s Creek, and then time to get ready for another busy Sunday brunch tomorrow.

Daily Total: $35

Money Diaries are meant to reflect an individual’s experience and do not necessarily reflect Refinery29’s point of view. Refinery29 in no way encourages illegal activity or harmful behavior.

The first step to getting your financial life in order is tracking what you spend — to try on your own, check out our guide to managing your money every day. For more money diaries, click here.

Do you have a Money Diary you’d like to share? Submit it with us here.

Have questions about how to submit or our publishing process? Read our Money Diaries FAQ doc here or email us here.

Like what you see? How about some more R29 goodness, right here?

A Week In Philadelphia, PA, On A $54,000 Salary

A Week In Raleigh, NC, On A $132,000 Salary

A Week Being Unemployed In Charleston, SC

DMTBeautySpot

via https://www.DMTBeautySpot.com

Refinery29, Khareem Sudlow

#DMTBeautySpot #beauty

Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.

Today: a settlement coordinator who has a joint income of $56,500 per year and spends some of her money this week on a tattoo.

Occupation: Settlement Coordinator
Industry: Personal Injury Law
Age: 27
Location: Gainesville, FL
My Salary: $41,500
My Husband’s Salary: $15,000
Net Worth: ~$12,000 (Savings: $18,069.66; checking: $1,685.07; my IRA: $7,808; my 401(k): $7,953.50; my husband’s IRA: $1,792.03; minus debt)
Debt: $24,457 (my husband, J., is currently accruing student loans)
My Paycheck Amount (2x/month): $1,311.75
Husband’s Paycheck Amount (2x/month): $600
Pronouns: She/her

Monthly Expenses
Rent: $875
Car Payments: $0 (paid off my car three years ago and we paid for J.’s truck in cash)
Utilities: $200
Internet: $73
Car Insurance: $186
Cell Phones: $100
Netflix: $20
Renters Insurance: $21
Spotify Premium: $15
Pet Costs: $50
Health Insurance: $0 (my employer generously covers our health insurance premiums in full)
Gym Membership/Fitness App: $18

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yes, I absolutely felt pressure to go to school. I’m the oldest of my parents’ three children so I feel like there’s always been a lot expected of me. Both of my parents got their bachelor’s degrees in their late 30’s and made a very big deal of it. My siblings and I attended their ceremony, and we had a huge party and were so proud of them. I did two years at a local community college to get my AA and then transferred to a four-year university to get my Bachelor’s in Healthcare Administration. I was very fortunate because my father is a disabled veteran, so my entire education was paid for and I received a monthly stipend to help cover my living costs. I also did well enough in high school to receive a scholarship, so I was honestly banking over $1,000 a month while I was in school. This is a really big reason I never dropped out because I would lose these benefits if I did not complete my degree. I was not passionate about school at all and my program was extremely boring. I was a very mediocre student and graduated with a 3.3 GPA.

Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
My parents talked to me about money, but I also paid really close attention to my parents’ financial habits. My father has bipolar disorder and could be a bit erratic with his spending, but my mother was very stable and more levelheaded in her decision-making. Between the two of them, I ended up with a really good understanding of the importance of saving money. However, I did have to teach myself how to finance a car, re-finance a car, do my taxes, etc. I do remember getting a small allowance when I was a child if I did my assigned chores. My father also started a savings fund for all three of us to use for college but by the time we made it to college-age that money was gone. My parents had a nasty divorce when I was 19 and I’m sure the money disappeared during that time.

What was your first job and why did you get it?
My first job was Sonic as a carhop. They made me skate on every shift. YIKES. Falling was not fun, especially with a tray full of milkshakes. My parents encouraged me to get a job so that I could pay for my own gas and car insurance. They purchased me a Red PT Cruiser when I turned 16. I also think they stopped giving me an allowance at this point, so I had to pay for any social activities myself.

Did you worry about money growing up?
Not at all. If my parents went through any financial hardships, I was not made aware of it. It was always very important to my father that we seem wealthy. We lived in a small town in the south growing up and social status was a big deal. We always lived in big houses (my dad called them McMansions) and had nice cars. When I look back now, everything that was important to my father was very superficial and we truly were not as wealthy as I thought we were at the time. But we never needed for anything. We took a lot of trips as well and my parents even bought my childhood best friend a season pass to Six Flags in Atlanta so she could come on our family trips with us.

Do you worry about money now?
Yes and no. It definitely does not constantly consume my thoughts, but I try to be mindful about our savings account and like to keep it as full as possible. We used to only give ourselves a $100 a month allowance for extra stuff, but we’ve been bad about sticking to that lately. I am a little worried about J.’s work situation because we do not know how long his current internship will last.

At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
I became completely financially responsible for myself when J. and I moved in together when I was 20. I was mostly responsible for myself at 18 but still lived with my mom rent-free after my parents’ divorce. We view our savings as a safety net, but if we were ever in complete financial distress my mother and stepdad would help us. We’ve never had to ask for support though and we would prefer to avoid that. We enjoy being self-sufficient!

Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
Nope and not expecting any either.

Day One

4:50 a.m. — It’s Monday! My alarm goes off and I wake up to pee and eat a banana protein muffin as a pre-workout snack. I did a lot of cooking and baking this weekend so when I open the fridge, I am very happy to see how full it is. My husband, J., struggles in the morning, so I leave him in bed with the dog for an extra 10 minutes.

5:40 a.m. — After we’re both awake and ready, we head to the gym. My calves are really tight today from a six-mile run yesterday so I opt to do a back, arms, and abs workout today. I’ve been using the Fit Body App for around three years now and love having an easy program to follow.

7:45 a.m. — Once we are back from the gym, J. and I shower and get dressed for the day. We work on getting our breakfasts ready and talk about how he is not looking forward to his day. Last week, he had to put in over 60 hours of work and he is exhausted. Our dog decides to get sick in the kitchen while I’m plating up my breakfast (YUCK). I eat breakfast, which today is two blueberry protein pancakes with some peanut butter, two eggs, two egg whites, and fresh raspberries. I brush my teeth, then head to work.

12:15 p.m. — Time for my lunch! I always take a 15-minute walk around the neighborhood behind my office and call J. to check in. We are a bit stressed because he found out today his paid internship will probably end in May. Although we can survive on my income, it is not ideal. J. lets me know that the dog seems to be doing fine. No more accidents in the house. I head back to my office and warm up some leftover asparagus soup and toast two pieces of whole-grain bread. I watch Gilmore Girls on my phone while I eat.

2 p.m. — I decide to go ahead and order J.’s anniversary gift. We have our five-year wedding anniversary next month. We were supposed to be spending it in Japan, but thanks to COVID, we had to cancel and will be spending the weekend in St. Augustine. I ordered him a skate box because he loves skateboarding but never wants to go to the park by himself. I’m nervous and really hope he likes it. I check with his best friend and he says it seems like a good one. $199

4:50 p.m. — I start wrapping up my work for the day and eat a quick snack. I have a red delicious apple and a handful of trail mix. I got pretty busy in the afternoon, so I am ready to head home to snuggle J. and the doggy.

5:20 p.m. — I get home and we take the dog for a walk and she gets sick twice again, so we go ahead and call her vet to see what they think. They tell us we can drop her off first thing tomorrow morning. During the walk, J. and I talk more about his job prospects if his internship ends in May and he decides he needs to get started on redoing his portfolio so he can apply to different firms.

6:30 p.m. — We get back home and J. heads upstairs to get started on his portfolio while I work on dinner. I make a tempeh stir fry.

8 p.m. — We eat dinner and get all the dishes cleaned and put away. I take the dog out and she gets sick again. Really glad I’m dropping her off at the vet tomorrow morning because I’m starting to get worried. We sit down to relax and watch Pirates of the Caribbean. I stretch and foam roll my calves for a bit.

9 p.m. — We snack on some cereal while we watch. Then, we head upstairs to brush our teeth then crawl into bed with the dog.

Daily Total: $199

Day Two

12:20 a.m. — I wake up to the dog whining and shaking. Take her outside because she is sick again. Really really starting to worry about her at this point. I head back up to bed and fall asleep after tossing and turning for a bit.

4:50 a.m. — I wake up and J. actually gets out of bed on the first alarm. I am shocked. I try to talk him into a rest day because my calves are still tight, but he wants to go to the gym, so I decide to tough it out. I eat another protein banana muffin and take the dog out so she can be sick again. Hoping she does not get sick in the house while we’re at the gym.

5:40 a.m. — We head out for the gym. I’m planning to do a pretty intense leg day today if my calves can stand it.

7:30 a.m. — We get back home from the gym. Glad J. made us go because I ended up having a great workout and progressed a bit from last week. I feed the dog breakfast, shower, and get dressed for work. I go ahead and pack my breakfast and lunch, so I have time to drop the dog off at the vet before I go into work.

8 a.m. — I drop the dog off at the vet and she acts pitiful. Makes me feel bad and just worry more. On my way to work, I try not to think about all the different things that could be wrong with her.

8:30 a.m. — I get to the office and start preparing a bowl of chocolate peanut butter protein oatmeal. I realize I forgot a banana. Damnit. After I finish eating, I clean up and get started on work

12:15 p.m. — I head out for my lunchtime walk and call my mom to catch up. I miss my family a ton and hate living so far away from them. When I get back to the office, J. calls me to let me know the vet called him and they did not find anything wrong. Yay! They are sending her home with some medicine for her tummy and some wet food. I warm up some leftover chickpea chana masala with naan and some steamed green beans. Still have time for a couple minutes of Gilmore Girls before I have to get back to work.

2 p.m. — J. calls to let me know he is picking up the doggy and that the vet bill is $137. He also sends me a cute Snapchat of her sitting next to him in his truck. She seems happy to be heading home. $137

5:20 p.m. — I get home from work and J. and I head out for a long walk with the dog. The dog doesn’t get sick on the walk so seems like the medication the vet gave her is working!

6:45 p.m. — We get back from our walk so J. and I get started on dinner. I’m making a plantain black bean enchilada bake with a cashew cheese sauce and a side salad. J. does all the knife work for me and then sits down to play some video games while I wrap everything up.

8 p.m. — We finish up eating dinner, clean up the kitchen, take the dog out (still no sickies yay!!), and then sit down to watch some more Pirates of the Caribbean. I can tell my glutes and quads are going to be toast tomorrow so I do a bit of stretching and foam rolling in hopes that I can manage a run in the morning.

9 p.m. — I make a blueberry Biscoff protein mug cake (OMG so good) and J. has half a Lenny’s and Larry’s cookie. We finish up our snacks and then head to bed for the night.

Daily Total: $137

Day Three

4:50 a.m. — I can tell my legs are too sore for a run this morning, so I stay in bed a bit longer and snuggle with J. We head downstairs after 20 minutes or so and get our days started. J. has his coffee and I drink a glass of cold water. We both scroll on our phones for a bit and then J. heads upstairs to get some homework knocked out. I watch a couple of YouTube videos then I read a chapter of Sharp Objects — my best friend recommended it and it’s really good so far.

6:30 a.m. — I head upstairs to shower and get dressed for work. I actually have time to straighten my hair today woop woop.

7:30 a.m. — I give the doggy all her medicine for her stomach and then start working on making my breakfast. I am having two eggs, two egg whites, two banana protein muffins with Biscoff spread, and some fresh strawberries and raspberries. I am a big fan of breakfast in case you couldn’t tell.

8 a.m. — I kiss J. and the doggy goodbye and head into the office for the day.

9:30 a.m. — I call Expedia to rebook a flight for my good friend’s wedding next month in California. The flight schedules are a nightmare since COVID, so I’ve had to rebook this flight a couple of times and I’m hoping I won’t have to mess with it anymore. Thankfully, there is no fee. I receive a message that a client has brought in two dozen doughnuts. I grab a maple glazed.

1 p.m. — I head out for my lunchtime walk and call J. to check in. He’s not in great spirits today and thinks he’ll have to skip our walks and the gym for the rest of the week because his homework load just grew even more than he expected for the week. I can tell he’s frustrated so I let him go and call my mom. I head back to the office to warm up lunch and watch some Gilmore Girls. Today I have leftover white bean chili with some tortilla chips and some steamed green beans.

4:40 p.m. — I grab an apple for a quick afternoon snack while I wrap up my workday. Today was pretty slow at work but I’m hoping that J. will be able to relax a bit tonight.

5:30 p.m. — J. and I get changed and take the dog for a long walk. It’s beautiful outside and we even hold hands for a bit. We admire all the trees starting to bloom and chat about our day. We really love taking these daily walks together because it’s a time for us to focus on each other and stay off our phones for a bit. Still no sickies for the doggy so I think she has made a recovery!

6:50 p.m. — We get home and J. sits down to play some video games. I start to prepare dinner and tonight is a new recipe! I’m making a mushroom stroganoff with red lentil pasta. While I’m cooking dinner, my little brother calls me and we chat for about 30 minutes. I hop off the phone to plate up our dinner. Unfortunately, it’s not the best and we give it a solid 6/10. Still very edible but a bit bland for our taste.

8 p.m. — We clean up from dinner and commence our nighttime ritual. Finish off the third Pirates of the Caribbean and more foam rolling for me. I also step on J.’s back for a bit.

9 p.m. — J.eats a donut I brought him from work and some popcorn. I make myself a peanut butter protein mug cake with some chocolate chips. We finish up our snacks and head to bed with the doggy.

Daily Total: $0

Day Four

4:50 a.m. — Alarm goes off and I lay in bed for a couple of minutes and try to wake up. I head downstairs to eat a protein banana muffin and drink a glass of water. J. wakes up and starts getting ready for the gym.

5:40 a.m. — We head to the gym. I’m planning to do a chest, shoulder, and ab workout this morning.

7:30 a.m. — We get back from the gym and start on our morning routine. We both shower and get changed. I head downstairs and get the dog’s breakfast ready for her (including the three medications her vet prescribed). This morning I’m having chocolate peanut butter protein oatmeal again but thankfully I’ll have my mashed-up banana this time. P opts for a HUGE bowl of protein oatmeal with just banana but adds granola and a million tablespoons of peanut butter.

8:00 a.m. — I finish up my delicious breakfast (this is my fave by far) and head into the office for the day.

12:30 p.m. — I head out for my lunchtime walk and call J. to catch up on our days. He lets me know that he’ll need to borrow my car tomorrow so he can drive to Orlando to his office. We are very hopeful the firm will keep him on past May, so he wants to make a good impression with them. I head back to the office and heat up the leftover tempeh stir fry and watch some Gilmore Girls.

4:15 p.m. — I eat a protein bar and plan to run with the dog when I get home. I also go ahead and plan our meals for next week and make the grocery list. I’ve been doing this for years and it works really well for us. Less food wasted and I always know exactly what to get at the store. We typically make four to five servings of each meal we prepare so lunches are mostly leftovers. I normally go on Saturday mornings and get it knocked out early.

5:30 p.m. — I stop for gas on the way home. I get home from work and check in with J. He’s going to be doing homework until later this evening, so the dog and I leave for a jog. $28.54

7 p.m. — J. finishes up his homework and asks me to give him a quick haircut, so he looks nice for the work event tomorrow. I’ve been cutting his hair for him since COVID started and just never really stopped since it saves us money and I do an okay job at it. I throw together a lazy dinner of Gardein nuggets, Annie’s vegan mac and cheese, and a side salad. This is our favorite comfort meal.

8 p.m. — We get everything cleaned up from dinner and plop down on the couch. Disney+ doesn’t have the fourth Pirates of the Caribbean and we don’t want to skip to the fifth one, so we decide on Maleficent for tonight (one of my faves!).

9 p.m. — J. shares the donuts I brought home for him and then I also have a bowl of Special K protein cereal. We head up to bed and pass out.

Daily Total: $28.54

Day Five

4:50 a.m. — Alarm goes off and I realize it’s Friday, woop woop! Head downstairs to eat my muffin and drink some water. Yell at J. from the couch to get moving. He begrudgingly crawls downstairs for his pre-workout drink.

5:40 a.m. — We head to the gym and I’m planning to do another leg day today!

7:30 a.m. — We get back from the gym and I’m pooped. We shower and get dressed for the day. It’s casual Friday at the office, so I throw on my new boyfriend jeans from Old Navy — so cute and comfy! I make some blueberry protein oatmeal and top it with sugar-free syrup and a Biscoff cookie. So good. J. finishes off the muffins and warms up some vegan breakfast sausage. I unload the dishwasher and feed the doggy.

8 a.m. — I finish up my breakfast and head to work. I’m taking J.’s truck since my car is way more reliable for long trips and J. will have to drive over four hours today. Super glad I wore Converse because I haven’t driven a stick in a few months.

10:45 a.m. — J.’s anniversary gift is delivered to my office. I can’t believe that came so fast especially since I did the free standard shipping. I hope he likes it!!

1:15 p.m. — I head out for my lunchtime walk and call J. to see how his drive to Orlando is going. He had a really good morning in classes and had a presentation that went super well. He lets me know he wants to try to be back by 7 so we can meet up with his classmates at a local park for drinks. He also thinks he won’t have to do any homework this weekend and I’m stoked because that means we can actually do some fun stuff together! Normally on the weekends I just grocery shop, clean, and try to find things to amuse myself while J. does homework.

4:15 p.m. — Boss man cuts us loose early since it’s Friday woohoo! On the way home, I drink a chocolate protein shake.

4:45 p.m. — I head out for a walk with the doggy and call my little sister to check in. We talk the entire time and it makes my heart happy. I miss my family so much and I’m stoked I’ll get to see them next month. The wedding I’m going to is just a couple hours away from my mom and sister, so I’ll go spend a couple days with them after the wedding.

6 p.m. — We get back from our walk and I head to Publix to pick up our weekly groceries. I also stop by the ATM and grab $200 because I’m getting a tattoo tomorrow and always prefer to pay in cash.

7 p.m. — I get home from Publix and get all the groceries unpacked. It was $151.31 which is right on budget. Our monthly grocery allowance is $700-$800. I put away the laundry J. started earlier, sweep the floors, and decide to give J. his anniversary gift early because he has this weekend off. He won’t get another opportunity like this to have the whole weekend to mess with the skate box and selfishly I’m too excited to see him open it. I grab the box out of his truck and set it in the living room. $151.31

8 p.m. — J. gets home from Orlando and LOVES the gift. He looks like a little kid, he’s so stoked. I’m so glad I reached out to his best friend and got his advice on a high-quality box. J. thanks me profusely and then bikes up to the local park to meet a couple of classmates for a beer. He promises he’ll be home by 10 so we can snuggle a bit before bed. I decide not to go because I’m tired and want to read my book.

8:30 p.m. — I heat up some leftover plantain enchiladas and make a side salad. After I finish eating, I lay down and read a couple more chapters of my book. It’s getting super good so I might end up finishing it this weekend.

9:45 p.m. — J. gets home and thanks me again for the gift. He bought two beers at the park with his buddies. $15

10:30 p.m. — We watch a bit more of Maleficent before bed. I make a peanut butter chocolate protein mug cake and J. has a Lenny’s and Larry’s cookies. We head up to bed with the doggy and pass out.

Daily Total: $166.31

Day Six

7 a.m. — We are up without an alarm! I can’t remember the last time we just let ourselves wake up naturally. It feels really nice. We lay together, snuggle the dog for a while, and talk about the dreams we had the night before. We head downstairs and J. makes some coffee for himself while I drink a glass of water and read some more of my book.

8:30 a.m. — I sit down and eat some breakfast while J. works on putting together his skate box. I eat half a pumpkin bagel with some peanut butter and hemp seeds, two eggs, and some strawberries and raspberries.

9 a.m. — I head out to drop off my bridesmaid dress to be altered. This ends up costing substantially more than I thought. I’m surprised because I’m just having the bottom hemmed. Oh well, I’m just glad it zips more comfortably now with the girdle. $73.78

9:30 a.m. — I get home and J. is painting his skate box now. I sit outside with him and watch. I’m trying to spend less time on my phone this weekend, so I leave it inside the house.

10:30 a.m. — We head out for a long bike ride down. We decide to stop about seven miles into the ride to check out one of the walking trails off the bike path. We walk down the trail and there are a ton of alligators out today. It’s really amazing to see them in the wild. We even get to see a couple of them munching on fish which is exciting. We find a water spigot to fill up our thermoses and decide to head home since we spent quite a while on the walking trail.

1:30 p.m. — We get home and hop in the shower. We’re both starving so I throw some frozen green beans in the air fryer with garlic and olive oil and reheat the mushroom pasta from a few nights ago. After lunch, I throw a couple of beers in the refrigerator for later. We’ve found it helps us cut back on excessive drinking if we don’t keep cold alcohol in the fridge all the time. I go ahead and get some laundry started as well.

2:30 p.m. — J. heads outside to break in the skate box and I drag out a Gators beach chair and read my book to keep him company.

3:30 p.m. — We head inside and I make another double batch of the protein banana muffins and keep the laundry moving. I text my best friend and tell her to go ahead and pick a book for us to read together since I am almost done with this one. We decided we’re going to start reading books together so we can call and discuss them like a mini book club.

6:30 p.m. — J. plays video games for the rest of the afternoon while I keep reading my book. Almost done! We stand in the kitchen and eat chips and salsa together then I head out for my tattoo appointment.

8:45 p.m. — Tattoo all done! So glad it didn’t take more than two hours because I’m tired, hungry, and that hurt. The tattoo costs $200 with tip. My tattoo artist is moving in May so I go ahead and book our last appointment for April. I’ll miss her and am not looking forward to finding a replacement. $200

9 p.m. — I call J. to let him know I’m heading home and make sure I know what to order from the local pizza place. We order from them so often, they send us a Christmas card with a gift card every year. I order four pepperoni rolls and a large pepperoni pizza. It will be $22 with delivery and tip. $22

10:30 p.m. — We eat pizza, drink some beer and wine, and finish Maleficent. My eyes start getting heavy so I head upstairs to clean my tattoo and we pass out.

Daily Total: $295.78

Day Seven

6 a.m. — Alarm goes off and I realize I should have drunk more water before I passed out last night. I only had two drinks so I’m not hungover but I’m really dehydrated. We get up and I drink a ton of water and we start getting packed up to head to St. Augustine Beach for the day. We’re meeting a couple of J.’s classmates out there and one is going to catch a ride with us so he’ll be here in an hour.

7 a.m. — We catch up a bit with J.’s classmate (C.) and eat muffins together. J. and I share some vegan breakfast sausage and then we hit the road with the doggy as well. This beach is dog friendly so it’ll be a fun day.

9 a.m. — We make it to St. Augustine and J. stops at a surf shop to grab some beach wax. He tells me it was $2 and he’s bummed he left his wet suit at home because the water is still pretty chilly. $2

2:30 p.m. — We have a great morning at the beach with J.’s classmates and drink a couple of beers and munch on some snacks we brought from home. We leave the beach to grab some lunch together.

3:30 p.m. — We stop at Mojo’s Tacos. Almost everyone with us is vegetarian and this place has the best tofu or tempeh tacos and burritos. J. gets us each a beer, himself tempeh arepas, and a tempeh burrito for me. $28.65

4 p.m. — After lunch, we decide to drive to the downtown area so we can walk through the shops and admire the historic buildings. Of course, there’s no free parking so we have to locate a parking garage that IS NOT cheap. $15

5:30 p.m. — We decide it’s time to head home, we’ve still got an hour and a half drive and were all exhausted from the drinks and sun. I stop by the popcorn shop because I can’t resist. They have a ridiculous number of flavors but I go with Biscoff and Oreo Cheesecake YUM. I make sure to give a tip because they are really dead and I feel bad. $13.36

6 p.m. — On the way home, we stop to fill up our tank and grab some water. C. pays for the drinks to thank us for driving today. $31.93

7 p.m. — We finally make it home; we didn’t plan to stay out all day so we put away the beach stuff and take a shower with the doggy because she stinks from playing at the beach all morning. J. warms up some toast and vegan nuggets for dinner and I’m having serious heartburn from the beers so I hold off on eating for now. We decide to rent the fourth Pirates of the Caribbean. $3.99

9 p.m. — I make myself a bowl of peanut butter chocolate protein oatmeal and then we head up to bed and pass out. We are completely pooped from spending all day running around in the sun.

Daily Total: $94.93

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A Week In Hong Kong On A $225,600 Joint Salary

A Week In Kentucky On A $71,558 Joint Income

A Week In Belgium On A $56,700 Joint Income

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via https://www.DMTBeautySpot.com

Refinery29, Khareem Sudlow

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Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We’re asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we’re tracking every last dollar.

Today: a consultant who has a joint income of $225,600 per year and spends some of her money this week on Prada loafers.

Occupation: Consultant
Industry: Banking
Age: 33
Location: Hong Kong
My Salary: $125,000 + 30-40% bonus
My Husband’s Salary: $100,600 + 5-10% bonus
Net Worth: $781,600 ($118,600 in savings, $142,000 in retirement (every month we both volunteer an additional 5% of our salaries into retirement and my company matches + an additional 2%), $70,000 government bonds (U.K.), $7,000 in company shares, $417,000 house in U.K., $27,000 in our U.K. bank account for rent collection and government bond payouts. We also have $2,000 in red packets for our child’s first lunar new year (which we do not consider as our money, we’re simply custodians until our 11-week old baby is old enough to access savings). Our finances are combined.
Debt: $0
My Paycheck Amount (1x/month): $10,410
My Husband’s Paycheck Amount (1x/month): $8,383
Pronouns: She/her

Monthly Expenses
Rent: $4,383 for a three-bed, three-bath apartment
Full-Time Helper: $1,031
Spotify: $11
Netflix: $13
iCloud storage: $10
AppleTV+: free with phone contract
Utilities: $150
Phone: $34
Health Insurance: $0 (work covers insurance for my family)
NY Times: $2
The Guardian: $19.99
Money Sent To My Parents: $500
Private Medical Insurance: $5,796 (annually, we chose private for the birth of our baby)

Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
Yep. My mom was an OBGYN and my dad was an engineer. Both pushed for higher education so I have an undergraduate and master’s degree and my sister is a doctor. I went to the U.K. for my university education and my parents paid for it. They also paid for my living expenses for the first month of the first year but promptly cut me off when I blew through the whole term’s worth of allowance in a month. I got a job working as a waitress at a sushi restaurant and paid for myself for the rest of the first year. They reinstated my rent money in the second and third year and the first year of my masters (Second year of my masters I moved back to Hong Kong to live with my parents where I worked and studied).

Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
Not many conversations as my parents were working their butts off to make ends meet when I was a baby. But then my dad’s career took off and we became very comfortable. My parents are both retired now and they are enjoying a good life, deservedly so.

What was your first job and why did you get it?
Waitress at a sushi restaurant in the first year of university because my parents cut me off for spending money like a lunatic.

Did you worry about money growing up?
My parents left China when I was 3. My mom gave up everything to support my dad going to school in Australia — her medical license, her salary, her independence — and ended up doing things like cutting loose threads in garments to make ends meet. Money was tight for a couple of years, but after my dad graduated, he made a good living to the point where he bought land and built our family home in Melbourne. Then we moved to Hong Kong and my dad’s career really took off, at which point we did not worry about money.

Do you worry about money now?
Yes and no. Yes, because my husband, V., and I have set out plans for the next few years and we have milestones that we need to hit. No because we make good money, will always have good job opportunities (the importance of building a strong network and never burning bridges is KEY to having a wealth of good job opportunities to explore!!), and we sit on a healthy safety net so if anything were to go wrong *knock on wood* then we’d be okay in terms of finances and housing.

At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net?
22, when I moved out of my family home, and into a flat with V. We have built a strong enough financial safety net, but if it were all to go tits up, we could turn to our parents for help.

Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain.
V. received an inheritance when his uncle and his grandma passed away. When the time comes, I will as well. In the meantime, as part of my culture, I pay a monthly stipend of $500 to my parents and have done so since I returned to Hong Kong when I was 21 (so 12 years). They don’t ask for the money and I don’t know what they do with the money, but I do it because I like to take care of them as they’ve done such a good job of taking care of me.

Day One

4:30 a.m. — Our daughter, B., wakes up shouting, which kind of makes sense as she’s hitting herself in the face. She’s 10 weeks old and strong as hell, so we have unswaddled her this week and she’s been a superstar at sleeping unswaddled. Breastfeed her and she passes out again in 15 minutes. Stick her back in her Next2Me and I head back to bed.

6:50 a.m. — Wake up to my husband, V., passing me a hot water bottle. Before most feeds, I put a hot water bottle on my left breast, as I recently had a breast abscess. What does that mean? It means I was in a lot of pain, with multiple visits to a breast surgeon, multiple needles to aspirate the pus that had collected, and multiple visits from a lactation consultant to “massage” (aka pummel the sh*t) out of my breast to get the milk flowing.

7:25 a.m. — H. arrives. She is our full-time helper and we adore her. She comes into the nursery to say hi and then takes our puppy for his morning walk; he loves rushing into the nursery to say hi and then sprinting off.

9 a.m. — B. has been fed, changed, and after playing for an hour on her Lovevery play gym, she’s back in her nursery to sleep for two hours. We’re following a sleep schedule and she’s been an absolute champion at learning how to self-settle. We have been very lucky with how good she is at sleeping, but we have also been militant at following the schedule because we LOVE. OUR. SLEEP.

9:30 a.m. — Greek yogurt and homemade granola for breakfast along with my daily supplements. I also do my PT.

12 p.m. — Feed and change B. then hand her over to H. I grab a quick lunch of potato salad and set off on a lunchtime hike. I like to listen to podcasts while I do this. Right now, I’m going through the back catalog of Armchair Expert (I know!! I’m so late to the game) — it’s a good break for me mentally and it’s a great challenge physically.

3 p.m. — Back! Boobs out and B. is feeding away. She loves to look at me, smile, and babble away as she eats.

4:30 p.m. — V. has been working from home, and he’s finished his last call for the day. He pops on the Ergobaby and takes B. out for her early evening walk/nap. I start dinner — we will be having chicken thigh and kimchi stew with pearl barley. It’s the easiest meal in the world and absolutely delicious!!

5:30 p.m. — V. and B. are back from their walk. They come into the bedroom to say hello as I’m finishing up some job applications. I take a shower before getting dinner ready for B.

7 p.m. — Bedtime for B. V. and I make ourselves some fresh lime sodas and hang out.

7:30 p.m. — Serve up dinner and start watching Unforgotten on ITV. It’s a British police show and it is absolutely amazing.

10 p.m. — Bedtime for me! V. does a last feed and then joins me.

Daily Total: $0

Day Two

2 a.m. — B. wakes up shouting. She’s done a massive poop and is not happy about it. Change her and feed her for 15 minutes and then she’s back to bed.

6:50 a.m. — Alarm goes off! B. is awake and staring at the ceiling. I put her in bed with V. and they start babbling to each other. I do my quick morning routine (brush teeth, contacts in, eat a banana) and head into the nursery to set up for B.’s breakfast.

8:50 a.m. — Today is bonus day. As I’m on maternity leave, my line manager WhatsApp calls me to catch up and let me know what my bonus is. Performance this last year has not been great (duh, COVID), so going into this conversation, I had the lowest of expectations for the bonus. It turns out to be great so I’m very happy. On the FLIP SIDE, fixed pay has not increased at all this year — it’s company-wide so not a slight on me, but it’s still disappointing. H. makes me two hard-boiled eggs for breakfast.

10 a.m. — Continue working on job applications. I am happy where I am and enjoy the work and the people, but every few years I feel an itch for a change/challenge and I want to up my pay package. I submit three job applications, make a note of them so I don’t forget, and save some more jobs to apply to later.

11 a.m. — B. scratched her cheeks while sleeping, so I go on Amazon to peruse some gloves. I also grab some Epsom salts, three books, a big photo frame, and cheap running headphones for V. $67

1230 — Eat leftover kimchi barley stew with IKEA’s vegan balls to flesh it out a bit. The vegan balls are okay…nothing to write home about. I don’t feel like walking today, so I stay on the couch and continue reading The Dutch House. I’ve started and stopped this book SO MANY TIMES and I’ve finally gotten to near the end today. It’s not great TBH. I recently finished a memoir by Henry Marsh called Do No Harm and THAT was a brilliant book. Highly recommend.

3 p.m. — Feed B. who poops twice while feeding. H. takes her and puppy for their afternoon walk. Defrost two salmon filets for dinner. I have store credit for a pet food store so I get 36 cans of chicken breast for our cat. I pay the difference. $7

4:30 p.m. — Check our bank accounts, monthly budget, insurance tracker. T loves to track everything we spend and it’s rubbed off on me so I do a weekly check-in just to see where we are. Monthly budget for February is looking good so far. January was not a great month because it was SIX weekends and I had the breast abscess. Insurance payments are looking good as the breast abscess costs have all come back; thank goodness for that. Not only was it so much pain both emotionally and physically, but it cost an absolute sh*t ton. Thankfully, we purchased private health insurance for the pregnancy and birth of B. which is still covering me for the rest of this year. Coupled with the great work coverage that I have, everything has been covered.

7 p.m. — Fed and put to bed! B. shouts a bit, but it’s Friday which means a.) it’s the WEEKEND (kind of a bizarre concept during maternity leave) and more importantly b.) WE CAN HAVE AN ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE! Open a bottle of rosé and catch up with V. on his day, who works 50/50 WFH and in the office.

8 p.m. — Dinner is roasted pesto salmon with quinoa and avocado. Dessert is custard-filled tang yuan, a traditional Chinese dessert eaten at the end of the Lunar New Year celebrations.

9:30 p.m. — Milk and dump it in the sink because of the wine. Bedtime!

Daily Total: $74

Day Three

2 a.m. — B. is shouting so I pop her on my boob for 20 minutes until she passes out.

6:50 a.m. — Wake up!

8 a.m. — V. plays with B. on the mat. This includes reading a book — today’s pick is Hairy McLairy from Donaldson’s Dairy.

9 a.m. — H. puts B. to sleep in the nursery. I make breakfast for V. and me — avocado on bagels, seasoned with lemon and salt. Delicious.

10 a.m. — V. takes a shower and then climbs into bed with me. We have sex. It’s taken us a while to get to this point because another side effect of breast feeding is a dry vagina. That, coupled with postpartum depression has made sex complicated for me, but incredibly intimate for V. and me. I love my husband very much and he has been such a body of support for me.

12 p.m. — Get dressed, feed B., and hand her over to H. as V. and I have a lunch date with my friend and his boyfriend. They’ve been together for years but for whatever reason, this is the first time V. and I are meeting them as a couple!

2:30 p.m. —We meet for lunch. Peking duck is DELICIOUS. $128

3 p.m. — Stop by the Thai grocery shop and pick up Thai basil and som tam (Green Papaya Salad) for dinner. $6

4 p.m. — Back home, feed B., and now she’s lying on the couch babbling away at me. I put on the baby carrier and we head for a walk. After an hour, it’s time to head home for her bath!

5:30 p.m. — I take a shower. Kerastase shampoo and conditioner (the pink ones), Aveeno Skin Relief body wash, Dr. G Brightening Peeling Gel (weekly), and Cetaphil face wash. Skincare is my absolute obsession and right now I’m working through some lighter skincare as I feel like the baby hormones are tipping my skin towards the oily side. Toner is A’PIEU Madecassoside Fluid, serum is COSRX Snail Mucin, moisturizer is Tony Moly The Chok Chok Green Tea Watery Lotion, and eye cream is COSRX Advanced Snail Peptide Eye Cream. Lip balm is always Glossier. Body skincare is Aromatherapy Associates Reflect Oil (Black Pepper and Jasmine) on my stomach and both sides of my bottom for stretch mark prevention, and the rest of my body I cover in QV lotion.

7 p.m. — OnTheList is having a sale on Mustela baby products, so I pick up some face creams, body lotions, sunscreens, body washes, and more creams for B. Work sent me a huge basket of their things when B. was born in December, and they seem to be super gentle and nice on her so this is a great chance to stock up. $65

7:30 p.m. — Dinner is pad krapow (Thai basil and minced pork) served over jasmine rice, and som tam. V. makes me a gin and tonic. I bought some brightly colored gins a while ago in anticipation of my post-pregnancy treats and it was the best decision ever.

9:30 p.m. — Milk and dump and then head to bed.

Daily Total: $199

Day Four

4 a.m. — Feed B. for 15 minutes and then go back to sleep.

6:50 a.m. — Sunday! Wake up and get B. changed and on the boob for breakfast.

9 a.m. — Instead of playtime today, we put her in the stroller and take her for a two-hour walk. We talk about putting a will in place; we need a will in the U.K. and in Hong Kong. I add it to my list of things to do next week. Stop by the deli to get cheese — 24-month parmesan and pecorino romano. $21

12 p.m. — B. has been fed and is now on the playmat with V. I make lunch — roasted peppers and caramelized onions with red pesto pasta. Delicious! I also make lunch for tomorrow.

2 p.m. — I check my retirement funds — I have two. The MPF fund is doing poorly as the indexes I am tracking are tanking. I make a note to keep an eye on this. My plan is for this to go back up to a certain amount, then I’ll switch it to a low-risk index.

4:30 p.m. — Bundle B. up in the baby carrier and the three of us head out for a walk.

5:20 p.m. — B. is growing out of her bodysuits, so I go on Next Direct and buy her five long sleeve bodysuits, five short sleeve bodysuits, and five pairs of leggings. Then I give her dinner and put her to bed. $45

7:30 p.m. — Dinner is a roast. V. roasts a rack of pork and prepares sides including apple cider purple cabbage, honey roasted carrots, and broccoli. He also makes a delicious gravy from scratch to go with the meal.

9 p.m. — Wash, dry, and wipe up the kitchen while V. takes the pup for a walk. Lots of leftovers so we can have a couple of sandwiches for lunch next week.

9:30 p.m. — Milk and head off to bed.

Daily Total: $66

Day Five

3 a.m. — B. wakes herself up with a giant poo. Change her diaper, feed her, and back to sleep.

6:50 a.m. — The three of us have a cuddle in bed before I take B. to the nursery for breakfast and V. jumps in the shower. With the vaccines starting and the number of COVID cases hovering under 20, workplaces are moving towards 80% office working.

9 a.m. — Head to the bank to open a bank account for B. Lunar New Year has ended so we are depositing her red packets (lucky money) from family and friends. She made a very good haul this year — may this continue for her!

11 a.m. — H. heads out to do our weekly shop — there is an ungodly amount of chocolate on our shopping list as V. is keen to perfect a homemade brownie recipe. She grabs vegetables, fruit, yogurt, milk, and noodles. I order all of our meat and fish from the butchers and fishmongers, and cleaning products/diapers, etc. from the supermarket. $64

12:30 p.m. — I meet up with a friend and we have lunch. Deep-fried pork chops over Japanese sushi rice, with a spring onion chimichurri sauce. DELICIOUS. $8

2 p.m. — We go window-shopping and I stop into Chanel to get a bag fixed. The customer service is unsurprisingly exceptional — free of charge and I’ll pick it up in a couple of months. We pass by Prada and I go in to take a look at their loafers. There are a pair of brushed leather loafers with the Prada logo front and center on either shoe. I try them on and love them, so I take a little bit of that bonus money and treat myself to a new pair of shoes. $1,096

7 p.m. — B. is down for the night so I make dinner and watch TV. My favorite show in the world is back on TV — Gogglebox! It’s a show where you watch families in the U.K. watch Tv. Sounds dumb and meta, but it’s the loveliest show in the whole wide world and it makes me miss the U.K. and V.’s family very much. We make cups of Yorkshire tea, the perfect accompaniment to the show.

9:30 p.m. — Express milk and head to bed.

Daily Total: $1,168

Day Six

6:50 a.m. — B. slept through the night. She does this every now and then, so it’s a wonderful treat to have 8+ hours of uninterrupted sleep. V.’s up already and hands me a hot water bottle. He then hands B. to me.

9 a.m. — Pop B. back to bed and get my MacBook out and do a workout then have breakfast.

12 p.m. — Head out and grab a taxi to go meet my boss for lunch, wearing my new shoes. My boss loves them as much as I do! We head to the American Club (she’s a member) and I have a salmon and tuna poke bowl. We catch up for an hour on work, life, and family. She’s only been my boss for the last year but she’s been so supportive. Lunch is her treat. $9

4:30 p.m. — H. takes B. for a walk today in the pram. I download Sally Rooney’s Conversation with Friends and read a bit. I loved Normal People and can’t wait for the adaption for this book. $12.48

6 p.m. — Feed B. and put her to bed.

7:30 p.m. — Catch up with V. and talk about the progress we’ve made regarding setting up a will in Hong Kong. It’s pretty straightforward, but it will require us to go through our assets, etc. We agree to build a comprehensive list this weekend. Side note: there is no inheritance tax in Hong Kong, which is great. V. grabs a baguette — dinner tonight is sandwiches using the pork from Sunday. DELICIOUS. $3

9:30 p.m. — Express milk and then head to bed.

Daily Total: $24.48

Day Seven

3:30 a.m. — Feed B., back to bed.

6:50 a.m. — The weather is so poo. Wake B. up and have a cuddle in bed. V. picks her up and takes her to the nursery for her morning routine

8 a.m. — B. is fed and on the playmat wriggling around. Today’s book is The Hungry Caterpillar and she loves the giant butterfly on the last page.

9 a.m. — Do a workout and then have breakfast. Read a bit more of Sally Rooney while having a cup of peppermint tea.

12:30 p.m. — I go for a walk. I listen to more Armchair Expert.

4:30 p.m. — After feeding B., I wrap her up in the baby carrier and take her out for a walk. Then get her home, feed her, and give her a bath.

7 p.m. — V. is out with friends tonight, so I make myself a portion of steamed scallops with minced garlic over glass noodles. I also make our lunch for tomorrow — lemon and pea orzo salad. I’m trying to be inventive with our salads so it’s not just the same boring vegetables. So far so good!

9:30 p.m. — Express milk, catch up with V., and head to bed.

Daily Total: $0

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