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Donald Trump is many things, but he isn’t a fan of accountability. He will probably never take responsibility for the 400,000 Americans who died from COVID-19 under his leadership; he will never take responsibility for pushing his supporters to protest stay-at-home restrictions and, later, storm the Capitol in a deadly attack. But he would like to take responsibility for the U.S.’s “beautiful” vaccine rollout — even though governors were calling his distribution plan “a deception on a national scale” at the time of his exit from office.

Since Trump was banned from Twitter, he has taken to sharing his thoughts the old-fashioned way: via 50-word comments written on DIY presidential letterheads. On Wednesday, the office of the former president issued the following statement: “I hope that everyone remembers when they’re getting the COVID-19 (often referred to as the China Virus) Vaccine, that if I wasn’t president, you wouldn’t be getting that beautiful ‘shot’ for 5 years, at best, and probably wouldn’t be getting it at all. I hope everyone remembers!”

Enter: the internet reactions.

👁👄👁

i hope everyone. r e m e m b e r s

— David Mack (@davidmackau) March 10, 2021

This is the most asinine thing I’ve ever read, but I love that he’s relegated to ‘tweeting’ on a letterhead pic.twitter.com/F4EADOfrHb

— Angry Staffer (@Angry_Staffer) March 11, 2021

the kind of statement that you’d expect from a true former poster pic.twitter.com/Z0FRZI40Ru

— keyvan (کیوان) (@islamphobiacow) March 11, 2021

There is a lot we’ll remember about how Trump’s actions impacted the COVID-19 crisis in America, but this isn’t one of them. Thanks to his administration’s delayed reaction and long list of lies which led many Americans to believe the virus did not exist (or wasn’t life-threatening), the U.S. accounted for nearly 1 in 5 COVID-related deaths worldwide by 2021. Employees and experts from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said that they were “muzzled” under Trump, who attempted to discredit their advice and findings about the virus and the vaccine.

“Why would you bench the CDC, the greatest fighting force of infectious disease in the world? Why would you call Tony Fauci a disaster?” asked medical historian Dr. Howard Markel. “It just doesn’t make sense.”

Trump’s actions didn’t improve America’s overall vaccine distribution, either. In January, health officials and governors slammed the Trump Administration for repeatedly promising that they had a (nonexistent) national stockpile of vaccines. With this in mind — and after receiving a go-ahead from Trump’s camp — state leaders expanded eligibility and then panicked. “I am shocked and appalled that they have set an expectation on which they could not deliver, with such grave consequences,” Oregon Gov. Kate Brown wrote at the time. “Oregon’s seniors, teachers, all of us, were depending on the promise of Oregon’s share of the federal reserve of vaccines being released to us.”

Even Trump himself has been undecided about whether or not he wants to take credit for the country’s vaccine rollout: When he was actually in charge, he was very quick to say we shouldn’t thank him for America’s distribution. On December 29, when it became apparent that the U.S. would fall short of its goal to vaccinate 20 million people by the end of the year, Trump tweeted, “The Federal Government has distributed the vaccines to the states. Now it is up to the states to administer. Get moving!”

In case this wasn’t enough of a reminder: Trump was also the only living president who didn’t appear in a recent ad campaign designed to inspire trust in the vaccine — which is weird because, now that he isn’t in office, can’t tweet, and doesn’t have to deal with that pesky impeachment process, he clearly seems to have a lot of time on his hands.

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On Wednesday, the day before the launch of the H&M x Simone Rocha collaboration — a 111-piece collection of womenswear, menswear, and childrenswear — Chloë Sevigny was spotted in New York City wearing a piece from the highly anticipated collection. Her pick? A black-and-red floral frock with puff sleeves and a lace hem. If you were waiting for a sign to shop the collection, you just got it. 

Sevigny’s dress, a silk-blend midi dress with tiny roses printed across it, is available now and costs $249 — but it won’t be for long. Given the excitement surrounding the collaboration between the Swedish giant and the London-based brand, we’re expecting it to sell out in no time. If you need styling tips, follow the lead of Sevigny: She paired the dress with black socks decorated with ribbon bows (also from the collection!), heeled boots, a leather jacket, and lucite sunglasses. 

This is hardly the first time Sevigny’s been spotted in Rocha’s designs. The Oscar-nominated actress and fashion multihyphenate has long been a fan of the brand — so much so that, in 2019, she was walked in its fall ‘19 show. “I’m such a fan [of the brand],” Sevigny told Vogue of the experience. A year later, in March 2020, Sevigny was photographed at an event at La Mercerie in Manhattan wearing a white dress from Rocha’s spring ‘20 collection as maternity-wear. 

Shop Sevigny’s dress and socks while you still can on HM.com. 

At Refinery29, we’re here to help you navigate this overwhelming world of stuff. All of our market picks are independently selected and curated by the editorial team. If you buy something we link to on our site, Refinery29 may earn commission.

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Stacey Dash is very sorry for supporting former President Donald Trump, she says, joining a number of Trump supporters who recently denounced the former president following the January 6 attack on the U.S. Capitol. The former Clueless actress-turned-Republican talking head made a public apology during an interview with Daily Mail TV on Wednesday, during which she said that she had “lived her life being angry” but “that’s not who Stacey is now.”

In the interview, Dash explained that her opinions were “arrogant and prideful and angry,” adding that she is no longer that person. Instead, “Stacey’s someone who has compassion, empathy,” she declared, talking about herself in third person. Dash also said she felt she played a role at Fox News as “the angry, conservative, Black woman,” until she realized “that anger is unsustainable and it will destroy you.” 

Dash later added that when she watched what happened at the Capitol, where Trump supporters made a final effort at overturning the 2020 presidential election by violently storming the building, that was the end for her. “When that happened I was like ‘OK, I’m done. I’m truly done,’” she said. “Because senseless violence of any kind, I denounce. What happened on January 6 was just appalling and stupid.” 

But people online are not exactly accepting of Dash’s apology, with many noting that she is likely struggling to find work in Hollywood after associating herself with Trump. Dash endorsed Trump early on in his 2016 presidential run, with a donation to his Great America PAC. Over several years, she made a number of racist and misogynistic comments as a Fox contributor. For example, she suggested ending Black History Month because there wasn’t a white history month. She also suggested ending the BET awards and the NAACP Image Awards. In 2015, Dash claimed that former President Barack Obama “didn’t give a shit” about terrorism, at which point Fox suspended her and later decided not to renew her contract for the following year. 

Dash has also made transphobic and anti-feminist comments, stating that feminism is ruining men and masculinity. In 2018, the actress defended Trump’s comments that there were “very fine people on both sides” of the deadly neo-Nazi rally in Charlottesville, Virginia, where an anti-racist protestor was killed and many others were injured. 

In her apology, Dash noted that she’s no longer the same angry person she was in 2016, adding, “what people don’t know is that I made a lot of mistakes because of that anger.” She went on, “There are things that I am sorry for. Things that I did say, that I should not have said them the way I said them.”

Despite her apology and her acknowledgement that she would like to give the Biden administration a chance, it just might be too little too late.

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In late December, my mom told me she had just found out she would be getting the COVID-19 vaccine the following day. After months of worrying that my over-60 parents would get sick with COVID, I could now be sure that one of them, at least, would finally be a lot safer. The fact that she was eligible for the vaccine came as a surprise to me, her, and the rest of our family, but Tennessee, where she lives, had prioritized mental healthcare workers. My mom, a therapist, snagged an appointment without much trouble. Still, there was one obstacle: her guilt. 

My mom confided in me that, even though she qualified, she felt bad getting the vaccine since she’d transitioned to seeing clients virtually and thus felt like she wasn’t at a higher risk than any other 62-year-old. I have to admit, I kind of scoffed at her reservations. She wasn’t breaking any rules. Plus, she had worked tirelessly throughout the pandemic to support her clients, as well as her family and friends. Her guilt, in my mind, was completely uncalled for, and I told her so. After some reassurance, my mom went through with the appointment and was fully vaccinated by January 28. About two weeks later, my quick dismissal of my mom’s vaccine-uneasiness just a distant memory, I found myself experiencing nearly identical feelings of guilt when I found out I was eligible for the vaccine in New York — far sooner than I’d anticipated.

On the day that Governor Andrew Cuomo announced vaccination eligibility was expanding to include New Yorkers with comorbidities and underlying conditions, I scanned the list of what would make a person qualify and saw “heart conditions, including but not limited to heart failure, coronary artery disease, cardiomyopathies, or hypertension (high blood pressure).” Could it be me? 

I was born with a congenital heart defect called pulmonary valve stenosis. The valve between my heart’s right ventricle and pulmonary artery had not developed correctly in the womb, and, as a result, blood flow between the two was obstructed. I had a series of open-heart surgeries as a two-day-old, one-month-old, and two-year-old, none of which completely fixed the problem. My time in the hospital as a baby left me with seven scars, the two largest of which run from the top of my chest down to my stomach and across the entire right side of my back. My heart, too, was left with a hole, which means my oxygenated blood sometimes mixes with unoxygenated blood. What does that mean in my daily life now? Honestly, not that much. 

Okay, don’t get me wrong, having multiple surgeries before the age of three and missing a piece of a vital organ has definitely had a profound effect on my life and has had consequences for my physical and mental wellbeing. But now, at age 28, my lack of a pulmonary valve doesn’t loom so largely in my life. Yes, I am reminded of my health situation every time I walk up a flight of stairs, since I’m inevitably left winded, but that extra sweat and panting are, at worst, inconvenient and mildly embarrassing. As I’ve gotten older and gained more control over what my day-to-day life looks like, I’ve had to face fewer harsh realities related to my condition. Because my diagnosis isn’t something I think about all the time or even every day — especially now that I spend most of my time in my apartment rather than, like, walking up hills — I wondered if I was truly deserving of the vaccine. 

I confided my concerns to a few people, and just like I did with my mom, they acted swiftly to assuage my guilt about receiving my jab and encouraged me to sign up for an appointment as soon as possible. The rational side of my brain took over, and I made the decision to book something, but the guilt persisted — and actually got worse. 

Navigating through the hoops of booking a vaccine appointment was a stressful nightmare. I had to dig through Reddit message boards to find tips about when and where new appointments were posted and vigilantly refresh various websites hoping that I’d be lucky enough to jump on an open spot before it was booked by one of the many others who were doing the exact same thing. At first, I couldn’t help but think, What if one of those people is in a more critical medical situation than me? I set that thought aside and instead focused on scouring for an open appointment, something I could do relatively easily because I had time and internet know-how — two more things to feel guilty about. 

After two days of nearly constant monitoring, I managed to snag an appointment in my borough that was serving those with comorbidities. My guilt persisted. But why? I was following the rules, so why should I feel bad? Although I had been the one reassuring my mother just a couple months earlier, I couldn’t do the same thing for myself. So when I found out that, due to new vaccination sites opening up around New York City, I had gotten an appointment earlier than some people I know who are more at risk than I am, I felt terrible. It was just a few days’ difference, but it still felt so wrong. 

The pandemic has not affected all Americans equally, exposing even more clearly the huge inequities that exist in this country, and that holds true for the vaccination rollout as well: There are major disparities in who has been getting the vaccine. Though Black and brown people have been hardest hit by the pandemic, these communities are getting vaccinated at significantly lower rates than white communities. Those that live in wealthy areas are also receiving more vaccinations than those in poorer neighborhoods, and well-off white people are even infiltrating vaccination sites in low-income communities of color. The fact that you must have reliable internet access and a flexible work schedule to even be able to book an appointment further deepens these disparities. It should not be like this. In a country where nearly all of our systems are deeply flawed, this chaotic vaccine rollout is par for the course. But, it’s important to remind ourselves and others that refusing a vaccine if you qualify isn’t going to magically fix this broken system — and that, in fact, you’re protecting the most vulnerable people, including those who can’t get vaccinated, by getting your own shot as soon as you can.

“It’s important to remind ourselves and others that refusing a vaccine if you qualify isn’t going to magically fix this broken system — and that, in fact, you’re protecting the most vulnerable people by getting your own shot as soon as you can.”

While my own hang-ups — as well as the constant, unsolicited opinions on who should and shouldn’t be eligible for the vaccine flooding my Twitter feed — have made it difficult to rid myself of guilt completely, having loved ones in my corner who have pointed out that my vaccination does not mean someone else won’t get it has been vital. I had been able to see that when it came time for my mother’s vaccine, but I didn’t feel deserving myself. And yet, what does being “deserving” even mean? Every human deserves lifesaving medical technology, just like every human deserves basic healthcare. But, deserving these basic rights doesn’t mean everyone gets them, and, ironically, many of the very people who are classified as having comorbidities — whether a chronic illness, medical condition, or BMI over 30 — are often the ones who have been the most dismissed, neglected, mistreated, or even harmed by our healthcare system. There isn’t much equity in our healthcare system, but this, at least, feels like a step in the right direction.

When it came time for me to get the shot, I thought back to something I’d been planning for months: a post-jab selfie. I had long looked forward to sharing an image of myself, proudly holding up my arm on Instagram. Though my mouth would be covered by a mask (or two), you would immediately be able to tell that I was smiling. Back when the vaccines first became available, I was deeply obsessed with watching videos of healthcare workers getting their shots. I gasped with delight every time I came across a photo of someone’s elderly parents or grandparents with a BandAid on their bicep. Each of these posts provided me with a massive dose of hope and I was excited to eventually share my own. Now that the time had come, though, I couldn’t bring myself to hit the post button. 

I did take a selfie, which I sent to my partner, my immediate family, and my best friend, as I waited the requisite 15 minutes post-inoculation. But my guilt prevented me from putting the image anywhere public, especially because I felt the photo would need extensive context. My disability is a virtually invisible one, and I was too worried about the reactions from followers who wouldn’t understand why I qualified for the shot. 

My followers — anybody, really — can’t tell by looking at me that I don’t have a pulmonary valve. They also don’t know about the PTSD I struggled with throughout my childhood and adolescence, caused by years of being poked and prodded by doctors and nurses before I could even verbalize the feelings of violation. For a long time, I was grateful that I went through a lot of the physical trauma before my memory had developed, but the truth is your body is able to remember things even if your brain can’t. Those who don’t know me in an intimate, meaningful way also don’t know how humiliating it was for me to be a kid who couldn’t play tag or pass a swim test at camp, or how painful it was to have to explain myself to P.E. teachers who accused me of not trying hard enough. They don’t know that my heart condition will be a factor in some of the biggest decisions I’ll make in my life, like whether or not I’ll ever be pregnant. And they definitely don’t know about the incalculable times I’ve been questioned about my experience relating to my diagnosis. They don’t know about the nurses who have insisted that I’m not actually having the symptoms I’m reporting, or the doctors who haven’t taken the time to familiarize themselves with my medical history — either because they didn’t have time or because they couldn’t be bothered. 

These experiences have left me feeling alarmed and terrified to the point of tears about what might happen to me. I’ve been ignored by big hospitals when I desperately needed answers. I’ve also been told categorically incorrect information about my health. And yet, when it finally came time to take my health into my own hands, after years of being doubted by the healthcare system, I was still left feeling guilty. I was still the one doing the questioning, and wondering how others might be questioning me. I know it should be the system that questions itself and the people who shame strangers on the internet who should be interrogating their own motives, rather than mine, but, old habits are hard to break, even as I try to do just that.

Right before my vaccine appointment, my mom sent me a series of reassuring texts, just as I had done for hers two months earlier. We discussed all the bullshit we had dealt with from those both in- and outside of the medical system. I joked that being prioritized for the vaccine maybe made some of what I’ve endured my whole life worth it. As the mother of a formerly sick and anxious kid, she said it definitely still wasn’t, but she did concede that it was somewhat of a consolation prize. In a world where most of the people who get things first had a head-start from the day they were born, going for the gold — or silver or bronze — is usually impossible. So if you have the chance to get a consolation prize? Take it and run with it. I did. Guilt be damned.

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Elizabeth, 38, has been thinking about only one thing since last spring: moving her family to Portugal. But, neither she nor her husband, who she says is onboard with the idea, have ever been to Portugal, nor do they speak the language or know a single soul there. Yet, the two TV writers in L.A. have soured on the competitive nature and long hours of their unpredictable freelance jobs and have begun to imagine, as she puts it, “what else our lives could be.” Plus, their two-year-old daughter has barely seen another child this year; just one reason it seems like high time to look for a lifeline.

While Elizabeth had thought about moving abroad ever since the pandemic started, her interest in moving to Portugal, specifically, began when a friend bought a place in the city of Porto and raved about the wonderful food, climate, and cost of living. Elizabeth soon learned that the visa-application process is relatively straightforward for Portugal, and after five years of living there part-time, you could apply to become an EU citizen. She was sold, and began researching the possibility in-depth; at first, she spent about three hours a day on this activity, although now it’s more like an hour.

“I am DEEP on every real estate site,” Elizabeth told Refinery29. “I have researched all the regions. I know the visa options. Would you like to know the exact limits to remodeling an apartment in Lisbon? Would you like to know which regions qualify for a Golden Visa? Are you curious about affordable pod homes you can put on ancient vineyards?! I have spent hours doing this research.”

Will Elizabeth and her family ever actually relocate to Portugal? Truth be told, she says, she is not 100% sure, but if it does happen it won’t be for another several years. She has, however, also begun to make concrete steps toward making the dream a reality, starting a grad program in marriage and family therapy, both because the new career could let her work remotely from anywhere and so that she is able to leave L.A. and the TV-writing world.

Elizabeth is one of many people who has developed a pandemic “hobby” that is at once extremely engrossing, all-consumingly detail-oriented, and involves planning for an eventual post-pandemic future. For many, it can’t exactly be called “planning,” though — it’s more like “optimistically mapping out” or even just “active daydreaming,” considering the uncertainty that the future will pan out exactly the way they want it to. I’ve talked to dozens of people who fit into this pattern: They put together in-depth travel guides to places they may not be able to visit for a long time, they spend hours picking out outfits (without actually buying them) for far-off special occasions, they make elaborate dream-house Pinterest boards even as they rent for the foreseeable future. I, too, frequently engage in similar activities: My honeymoon was supposed to be in April 2020, and everything was planned out. Now it’s, let’s just say, a lot more planned out. This type of behavior can best be described as “pandemic window-shopping” — it’s somewhat like real window-shopping except we’re all on our phones or computers 24/7 and retail is dead, so we use Pinterest, save things to Instagram, and build spreadsheets. 

It’s logical that so many of us are engaging in these activities, experts say. “The pandemic has obviously been really traumatic and era-defining,” Vinita Mehta, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Washington, D.C., told Refinery29. “I think that one way to understand it and cope with the trauma is by staying future-oriented. Very often, when people are going through something extremely difficult or distressing, they handle it by focusing on the future. All of these activities, it all sounds to me like ways to think about what one’s future could look like.” 

On top of that, future-oriented activities that employ our imagination can actually be good for us and boost our mental health. Given that we’re in a national mental health crisis, this is no small thing. “This fantasy-like behavior can be quite therapeutic and serve a variety of adaptive and satisfying functions,” Dana Dorfman, PhD, a psychotherapist in New York City, told Refinery29. “One of the many purposes that fantasies and daydreaming can serve is they simulate emotional experiences that we yearn for. In the exercise of ‘imagining,’ we can glean some of the satisfaction of the actual experience.” 

“One of the many purposes that fantasies and daydreaming can serve is they simulate emotional experiences that we yearn for. In the exercise of ‘imagining,’ we can glean some of the satisfaction of the actual experience.”

Dr. dana dorfman, psychotherapist

This is the case for Natalie Held, 21, in Connecticut, who has been meticulously curating Pinterest boards with names like “pink Harry Styles aesthetic” where she pins inspiration for her future life in London and interior design for a future apartment. The London board helps her look forward to hopefully living there with one of her best friends next spring, “if all goes well.” It’s full of places they want to visit together, cute cafés, and pastel-pink doors. 

“This all drastically improves my mental health,” Held told Refinery29. “It not only gives me things and places to look forward to, but goals that I can work towards. My friend and I frequently send each other posts from Instagram and TikTok with inspiration for our future flat and fun adventures we can go on. If I didn’t have these little pockets of reprieve, I know I’d be in a lot worse shape.”

A lot of people I’ve talked to echoed Held in saying that their pandemic window-shopping helps them feel better day-to-day and gives them something to look forward to. Martine Elyse Philippe, a dance educator in Atlanta, says she has online shopping carts full of outfits on several sites with no intention of buying (at least not most of them) thanks to her pandemic-impacted budget. “I have outfits planned for future trips and vacations, weddings, baby and bridal showers, in-person work, concerts, birthday parties, happy hour with my girlfriends, and more,” she explained. “Thinking about and shopping for future events brings me a sense of hopeful anticipation.” Meagan Fredette, 35, a writer in Brooklyn, has a “secret Pinterest board for clothes/etc. to buy when the stimmy arrives.” (That would be the long-awaited $1,400 COVID-19 relief stimulus checks from the government.) Meghan*, 36, in Boston, has spent the pandemic planning a trip to Japan in such depth that she says she could write her own travel guide. Her wedding and honeymoon had both been planned for April 2020 and had to be postponed more than once since. “It’s self-soothing for sure,” she said. “Creating these spreadsheets makes the planner part of me feel better since everything has gone to shit. It’s more elaborate than previous trips to start because it’s for our honeymoon and I wanted it to be perfectly done. It started out as wedding-planning levels of detail, but has morphed into something more intense as I’ve built up more and more vacation time and credit card points.” 

Dr. Dorfman says this type of detailed planning can also be beneficial because it can help mitigate “impulse-buying” and the subsequent regret that comes with it. It can also help to take the feelings of inertia, ineffectiveness, and lack of productivity some are experiencing during the pandemic and sublimate them into forward-thinking tasks. For Julie Bogen, 29, an editor in Bethesda, MD, this means checking three different real estate apps multiple times a day, in hopes of finding the right house to buy with her husband — even while they theoretically have another year to do so until their apartment lease runs out. “I’m rolling over in the middle of the night and checking my phone to see if things have come on the market,” she told Refinery29. “It’s been a way to channel all of this pent-up energy that I would otherwise be putting towards things like researching restaurants to go to, or planning vacations.” 

Others don’t have such realistic plans of turning their window-shopping activities into reality. Suzanne Frush, 28, a product manager in Astoria, Queens, has been hard at work on something she calls “Zillow HGTV.” This involves finding fixer-uppers to “buy” on Zillow in upstate New York cities like Albany and Poughkeepsie that are far more affordable than New York City and have plenty of beautiful old houses, and planning out exactly what renovation projects she would do — complete with fake-but-plausible contractor estimates — using Pinterest for inspiration and Excel spreadsheets for budget planning. Frush lives in a rental apartment and doesn’t have enough saved for a down payment, but she says the activity has helped her use her dormant planning skills. “I’m an extroverted planner, and not being able to plan anything — travel, seeing people, work — has been really hard for me,” she said. 

And then, there are others who are procrastinating on acting on their window-shopping plans because, well, we’re in a pandemic. Sansa*, 25, in Washington, D.C., moved into her own studio apartment in May 2020 and has been researching potential couches to buy ever since. She keeps a spreadsheet of her options, complete with a list of pros and cons based on reviews from Reddit and real life. “But I have yet to buy a couch,” she said. “Because no one is coming over.” She added, “It’s fun to think about my mom visiting me and my friends coming over.” For now, however, her bed seems like enough — and, she reasons, why spend money on a couch if she’s moving away to go to law school in a couple of years anyway?

Dr. Mehta says that pandemic window-shopping reminds her of how children play and use their imaginations. “You will see this a lot when you’re doing play therapy with children,” she explained. “They will express what the things are that are making them anxious. And then, they’ll play out the things they want and the things they’re thinking about in their lives. It occurred to me that what adults are doing when they ‘window-shop’ is the same as how kids try to get a handle on their anxiety.” It’s possible to imagine that because our everyday activities have become so restricted, we have reverted to our inner child and gone back to the sandcastle. 

While most people window-shop in a way that is therapeutic for them, Dr. Dorfman notes that repetitively engaging in these types of activities could become unhealthy if it becomes a substitute for relationships or work and family obligations. (There are exceptions, though, like with Held, who shares her London dreams with her friend.) “If you’re consistently unable to tolerate or manage certain feelings and use these activities as the sole expression or as a way to avoid feeling negative feelings, the activity may be unhealthy or problematic,” Dr. Dorfman advised, particularly if it interferes with daily functioning like eating and sleeping. 

Dr. Mehta says that while it’s normal to attempt to cope with the all-encompassing trauma of the pandemic by focusing on your future, if you find yourself becoming “so future-oriented that you’re having a hard time focusing on the present,” it might be time to take a step back. Mary K. Alvord, PhD, a psychologist in Maryland and co-author of Conquer Negative Thinking for Teens, agrees and adds that overdoing the window-shopping could also interfere with our social lives, which have already been greatly affected during this period. “You want balance,” Dr. Alvord said. “So you can do that maybe for a few hours, but you need to get out and ideally have a variety of topics to talk to people about. You need to have contact with others.”  

Adequate and satisfying human contact is something that has been sorely missing from many of our lives, and something many people brought up during our conversations. Because while the often solitary nature of pandemic window-shopping can be soothing and therapeutic, as well as help us envision and be optimistic about our futures, it doesn’t replace an experience that is also key to our happiness: engaging and doing activities with other people. For Sansa, hanging out with family and friends was the drive for planning to buy a couch — and the inability to safely invite them over was a main reason for not buying one. A happy update occurred, however, as I was wrapping up this story: “My friends’ parents are giving away a couch, so I’m picking it up tomorrow,” she said. Here’s hoping she’ll be able to invite someone over very soon.

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You know you and your friends are real men so why is it still difficult to get dates?

You're good-looking guys and you have your outfits nailed, what's holding you back?

The secret is there's more to being attractive and stylish than genetics and clothes.

Today I'm going to share the final piece of the puzzle…

Click here to watch – 8 Things “Handsome” Guys NEVER Do!

Let's get straight into what real men never do!

#1 Real Men Don't Interrupt Other People

I get it. It's easy to get over-excited and blurt out your contribution to a conversation. You're buzzing with ideas and you want to be involved.

Don't cross the line though and become rude by taking away someone else's time. Being a good listener is a great look on anyone.

 

#2 Real Men Don't Pick Their Nose

Sound childish? I hope so because it is. You'd be surprised how many grown men I still catch doing this though.

You might think you only do it when others aren't around. But, you'd be surprised how many men do things like this without realizing it.

 

#3 Real Men Don't Leave Their Neck Hair Unchecked

Regularly shaving your facial hair and getting a haircut are taken for granted. But that's not all the hair you have. The back of your neck has hair which, if nothing is done, could start appearing up the back of your shirt.

Not very stylish…

Work with your barber. If they don't do it already, they should be happy to trim it for you the next time you're in. After that, it's up to you to maintain it. Don't let it get out of control.

 

#4 Real Men Don't Forget To Clean Up Afterwards

Gents, let's be honest. Too many of us are still using the toilet standing up, ‘shooting from the hip' and not cleaning up the damage. If you make a mess, it's your responsibility to clean it up, no-one else's.

The same goes for the gym. If your exercise bench is sweaty at the end of a session, wipe it up. Next, if you're strong enough to put your plates on the bar, you're strong enough to re-rack them afterward.

In short, I want you to own your actions. Leave places better than you found them.

 

#5 Real Men Aren't Afraid To Speak Their Mind

You want to make friends and be popular, right? It might seem like the best thing to do is nod your head and agree with everything people say. You're afraid to be honest because if people don't agree with you they might not like you.

I can tell you from personal experience this will backfire. Nobody likes a yes-man. People aren't stupid, agreeing to everything will make you seem cryptic because nobody knows where you really stand. Having a back-and-forth conversation and challenging each other is fun.

As Hollywood actor Paul Newman once said, “A man with no enemies is a man with no character”. I guarantee you'll be more popular because people might not 100% agree with you.

 

#6 Real Men Don't Complain

The converse of being too afraid to speak your mind is sharing every negative thought that comes into your head. This is another trap that's easy to fall into, the human mind has evolved to be very good at finding problems to mention.

The trick is learning to filter your thoughts and being constructive. It's the difference between complaining it's cold and offering to turn up the thermostat.

 

#7 Real Men Don't Spit

This is a habit some men fall into either from smoking or otherwise. Ultimately, this is almost universally disliked so if this is something you've fallen into doing, you need to stop doing it.

I talk here about how to break a bad habit. It's not easy, but it must be done and I guarantee you will feel better when you've done it.

 

#8 Real Men Clean Their Dirty Nails

You already wash your hands, what more can you do? Tiny bits of dirt will still be there, some visible and some not. Your fingers and running water can't get everything, you need something purpose-made. It will look bad and also smell.

Do you want your girlfriend to notice every time you even brush her cheek?

I highly recommend picking up some combination of a nail brush, file and scissors to really attack the dirt underneath your fingernails and around your cuticles. I prefer nail files and scissors but see what works for you.

 

#9 Real Men Don't Show Off

It's natural for someone to be proud of what they have accomplished but sometimes, men especially if we're being honest, can be guilty of taking it too far.

Being humble and modest can be very attractive to women who sometimes feel surrounded by braggers trying to impress them. It also means at work you don't let your mouth write a cheque your butt can't cash.

I guarantee your boss will be much more impressed if you under-promise and over-deliver than the other way around.

 

#10 Real Men Don't Forget To Trim Their Nose Hair

Another classic misconception is you can shave your facial hair and forget about the other very visible mustache growing out of your nose. There are a variety of ways you can do this from scissors to tweezers. I highly recommend a battery-powered circular trimmer for speed and comfort.

Gentlemen, tame the beast. Enough said.

So there you have it, ten habits you can avoid to instantly make yourself a better gentleman. I challenge you to elevate yourself above the men around you by taking these steps:

1. Give others their time to speak – don't interrupt
2. Blow your nose instead of picking it
3. Trim your neck hair
4. Clean up after yourself
5. Be confident, speak your mind
6. Be constructive instead of complaining
7. Don't spit
8. Keep your nails clean
9. Don't show off – modesty is a great look
10. Tame your nose hair

 

 

 

The post 10 Things Real Men Should Never Do | How To Behave Like A Gentleman appeared first on Real Men Real Style.

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